Domesticia
by Korrin Belle
Summary: A series of short, one-shots illustrating the ups and downs of married life, relationships, and family. M/M
1. Will You?

This whole story was formerly titled "Will You?" but was originally just planned to be a short one-shot. I've since decided to make it a series, and have renamed it accordingly.

**Will you?**

Ryuuji hefted the overnight bag securely over his shoulder as he walked back to the apartment he shared with Rin. He'd just gotten back in town from a mission and he was exhausted and sweaty, but that wasn't why he was lagging. He fingered the velvet box tucked securely away in his pocket. He'd stored it away in a locker at the station before starting the mission, afraid of losing it, but even more afraid of Rin finding it if he left it behind. It wasn't that he was afraid Rin would say no. They'd been dating since their last year of high school and living together for almost two, and he couldn't even remember when talks about _my _future or _your_ future had become talks about _our _future, so he was almost positive Rin would say yes, but this wasn't the first time things had gone wrong with his plans. How could he not be nervous?

He stopped in front of the old apartment building, looking up at it, trying to spot their window to see if the light was on, wondering if Rin was still awake. He'd texted him when he'd arrived back in town, but it had already been past midnight and he'd had to go through the mission debriefing and Rin's only response had been an infuriatingly short "K". He hoped Rin wasn't mad he'd missed their anniversary, but it wasn't like he'd had a choice. Ryuuji sighed, punching in his key code and entering the building, making a line for the elevator.

"Rin?" he called when he entered their apartment. The lights were low, but not off. It didn't look as if the other boy had gone to bed yet, though he may have just left a little light expecting Ryuuji's return. "I'm home. Are you awake?"

"In here," Rin called from the kitchen, and his eyes sparkled as he peaked out in to the hall to smile at Ryuuji before ducking back out of sight. Ryuuji felt a small weight lift from his shoulders.

He kicked off his shoes, dropping his bag in the hallway where it could wait until morning, and made his way towards the kitchen. He gaped at Rin as the other boy stood, holding a chair out for him, in front of a their small dining table which was laden with a candle lit dinner.

"What's this?"

"It's our anniversary dinner, duh," Rin said as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

"But our anniversary was two days ago." Ryuuji felt a bit like an idiot for protesting. Why was he complaining?

"So?" Rin asked with a cocky little smirk. "I know you had something big planned, but work is work, so there's no use complaining." He then patted the chair he was still holding and Ryuuji finally stepped forward to take a seat. Rin kissed him on the cheek in greeting as he pushed his seat in and Ryuuji tried to get comfortable as Rin sat across from him. Rin was right. Both of them worked erratic on-call hours, so neither of them could really complain, no matter how badly he wanted to. Even though he'd made dinner reservations more than three months in advance and had even made arrangements with the wait staff to surprise Rin. This wasn't even mentioning what had gone wrong last year on Rin's birthday or on Valentines Day. There was no use complaining about it now.

The ring sat in his pocket like a lead weight, an unused reminder he took as a personal failure, and Ryuuji wondered when he'd ever get around to popping the question at this rate. He'd just have to come up with a new plan. He always did.

The table was decorated with an old, patterned tablecloth Rin had pulled out of who-knows-where. At the center of the table was a single lit candle, already dripping wax as if it had been waiting a while, and a small faux-whicker basket filled with sliced garlic bread, still steaming as if Rin had just pulled it from the oven. Two plates of pasta already sat served on either side of the table and it smelled amazing, but Ryuuji let a small laugh escape when he saw the cans of Asahi beer standing ready next to the empty wine glasses.

"What? No wine? Isn't this a special occasion?" he asked with mock surprise.

Rin stuck his tongue out. "It's not like I could just hop over to a convenience store and buy a bottle at one in the fricken' morning. They did, however, have pre-baked garlic bread," he said, gesturing with a flourish to the basket at the center of the table.

Ryuuji snorted at the display. "I'm shocked," he said, "Rin Okumura serving pre-made food?"

"Try complaining after you taste the shrimp scampi," Rin said haughtily, turning his nose up in mock indignation as he popped the top off the cans and poured both their drinks.

"As if this took you more than twenty minutes," Ryuuji teased quietly as he began to eat, but he paused half way through the first bite.

"Something wrong?"

"No, of course not," Ryuuji said quickly after swallowing the food and wiping his mouth. "I just ... I find it hard to believe that even after all these years your cooking still surprises me."

Rin beamed at the compliment, like a ray of light in the darkness, as a wide smile split his face and a light blush dusted his cheeks before he dug in to his own food.

They made light, comfortable small talk after that. Rin talked about his week and Ryuuji regaled him with all the boring details of the mission he'd been dragged away on. Most missions were tediously mundane. Contrary to popular belief, they didn't face world ending catastrophes on a day to day, or even a monthly basis. It did happen, but generally speaking, any mission that didn't require both of them was automatically classified as routine, or in Rin's words, boring as hell. Ryuuji found that funny. Given their line of work and Rin's parentage, he felt pretty safe in saying that Hell was anything but boring, but that was besides the point.

As they continued to eat, the conversation died down to a comfortable lull, and Ryuuji felt himself growing more and more drowsy as he ate. It was late. Ryuuji's day had been long and tiring, and now in the presence of excellent company and with a good meal in his belly, he would have loved nothing more than to take a quick bath and then collapse in to bed with Rin at his side.

"Say... Ryuuji?" Rin asked breaking the silence. His voice sounded almost wistful, but Ryuuji didn't catch it.

"Yeah?" he asked, barely looking up from his food.

"We've been going out for quite a few years now,"

"Six," Ryuuji interjected to specify. Leave it to him to remember the exact number without even having to think about it.

"Yeah, so..."

Ryuuji didn't register the hesitation in Rin's voice, but he looked up as the other boy pushed his chair away from the table. The wood scraped loudly across the cheap linoleum floor. He watched as Rin stood, only to swiftly kneel at his side, taking Ryuuji's hand and looking up at him with a hesitant, almost bashful, but deeply tender smile.

Ryuuji felt a seed of suspicion sprout in the pit of his stomach as he looked down at the other boy kneeling beside him. "What are you doing?" he asked flatly.

Rin's smile faltered slightly and he swallowed the lump in his throat, gritting his teeth before he continued. "I just... We've been going out for a long time and today's a pretty special day and-"

"Stop!" Ryuuji stood abruptly, cutting him off.

"Wha-? Let me finish!" Rin snapped, a pained scowl spreading across his features at Ryuuji's unexpected response.

"No!" Ryuuji said firmly, "You can't do this!" He started digging around in his pocket. Rin was ruining his plans! Carefully crafted plans that had already been ruined, again and again. Plans that had yet to be re-made, but at this rate they never would be.

"You asshole!" Rin shouted, surging to his feet and getting right up in Ryuuji's face to shout at him, practically nose to nose. "What the hell do you think I'm trying to do!?"

Ryuuji ignored him, grabbing Rin's wrist and slapping the velvet ring box in to his palm and then just waited as Rin looked down quizzically at the small object. His eyed widened and he looked back up at Ryuuji, his mouth hanging open. Ryuuji just nodded, and Rin opened the box. He stared at the contents unblinking, before snapping the box shut and looking back up at Ryuuji.

"Is this... Does this mean what I think it means?"

"Yeah."

Rin clutched the box tightly to his chest and bit his lip, before grabbing Ryuuji's head and pulling him down in to a kiss. It started hard and deep, open mouthed, but ended as a chaste brush of skin on skin as they slowly pulled apart. Ryuuji leaned his forehead against Rin's. He watched as Rin's eyes shone in the candlelight, and the other boy pulled away to brush away tears before they threatened to spill.

"Is that a yes?" Ryuuji asked quietly before unconsciously holding his breath.

Rin laughed, a quick, quiet, joyful sound echoing throughout the small, silent dining space. "Of course it's a yes, you idiot."


	2. Rings

**Rings**

Rin lay stomach down on the couch, peering up over the arm rest as he fingered the ring Ryuuji had given him. It was a band of silver tungsten carbide, inlaid with carbon fiber that looked like blue fire when the light hit it just right and Rin couldn't stop rolling it between his fingers, smiling like an idiot in to the arm rest.

The most amazing part was that Ryuuji had given it to him—_him—_that Ryuuji wanted to spend the rest of his life with Rin as much as he wanted to spend it with Ryuuji. The other amazing part was simply how perfect the ring was.

"Like your eyes, and well… you know…"

Ryuuji meant his flames of course, something that was an intricate part of who he was—both the good things and the bad—something that had taken him a long time to come to terms with and learn how to utilize. He wanted the ring he picked out for Ryuuji to be just as perfect, and he'd thought he had found it. There was only one problem.

Money.

It wasn't even that much considering how much they both made working fulltime as exorcists. It was simply more than he could afford to spend on short notice without talking to Ryuuji about it first, especially since they couldn't actually get legally married in Japan and were planning a very small religious ceremony on short notice. This meant he couldn't surprise him.

Ryuuji's proposal had been a surprise to Rin, not to mention the fact that he had a ring at all. Rin wasn't sure if he'd subconsciously picked up on a cue from Ryuuji or what, but his plan to propose had been on the spur of the moment. He hadn't thought he needed a ring. Now he did. Not just any ring either; The Ring.

Rin wasn't really sure what he'd been looking for when he went to the mall jewelry store, but he'd known it when he'd seen it—a ring of quilted gold surrounded by bands of black titanium. It was perfect, except for the $600 price tag.

Rin rolled over to stare up at the ceiling, groaning to himself as he rolled his ring between his fingers, admiring the way the light played off of it.

"Damn it, I definitely can't drop that kind of coin without talking to him first."

"Talk to me about what?"

Rin jumped and dropped the ring. His heart stopped as it skittered away across the floor and he scrambled after it, breathing a sigh of relief as he finally caught it. He slipped it back on and vowed never to take it off again before turning to face Ryuuji with an awkward laugh.

"I didn't hear you come in."

"I can tell," Ryuuji said, quirking an eyebrow, "Something bothering you?"

"Uh, no, just, um…" Rin fidgeted, his eyes darting about as he tried to figure out how to broach the topic without totally ruining any potential for surprise. "How much did you spend on my ring?" he finally asked.

"Oh… um," Ryuuji looked away from Rin, idly scratching his chin scruff. For a moment Rin thought Ryuuji was going to tell him he'd been saving for months to afford it, something that would be an impossibility for him right now, but then Ryuuji continued.

"Around $200."

"Woah, so cheap! Where'd you get it?"

"You're not upset?"

"Why would I be upset?"

"It's not very traditional. It's so cheap because it doesn't contain any precious metals or gems… I just thought…"

"Nah, it's perfect," Rin said, grinning down at the ring, his eyes sparkling as he looked at it. He then glanced back up at Ryuuji. "I just wanted to get something equally as perfect for you, but… I went to the mall today and all the prices are a bit much…"

"Going to the mall to look for jewelry was your first big mistake. Little mall stores are always gonna' rip you off," Ryuuji said, waving a dismissive hand. "Quality wise you gotta' go to a real jeweler and for the best deals you gotta' look online. It also helps if you're not in a hurry so you can wait for a sale."

"I don't really have that luxury, so I guess I'll look online," Rin said, "How long did you spend looking for my ring anyway?"

"Well, I bought it over a year ago and probably-"

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Rin asked, cutting him off, "You've been sitting on this thing for a year?! When were you planning on proposing to me?"

Ryuuji looked like a deer caught in a pair of headlights before rapidly turning on his heel. "Don't wanna' talk about it," he said over his shoulder as he tried to retreat in to the bathroom.

"Oh no, no, no, you're not getting off the hook that easily!"


	3. Adoption

**Adoption**

Rin paced through the apartment, glancing periodically at the sheets of government paperwork sitting on their coffee table only to curl his lip in annoyance, his tail lashing about behind him. He just wanted to marry the man he loved. Why did the world conspire to make it so much harder than it had to be?

He tensed as he heard Ryuuji's key in the lock, but slipped a smile on anyway.

"Welcome home," he said, greeting Ryuuji at the door with a kiss as the other man entered the building. He took Ryuuji's coat and hung it up for him, getting out of way so could enter their tiny apartment. "How was work? Are you hungry?" Rin asked, not even stopping to let Ryuuji answer, "I could make-"

"Rin."

Ryuuji's voice was stern, like a parent about to reprimand a child, and Rin tensed, waiting for what was coming.

"Did you submit the paperwork?"

"I-uh… Forgot. Again…" Rin said trying to force the usual lazy grin that came so easily when he really did forget. You couldn't blame him for an honest mistake. The problem was that he was lying.

Ryuuji sighed, and started to put his coat back on. "Where is it? If I hurry I think I can get it in before the office closes." He looked up when Rin didn't answer. The other boy was biting his lip, staring down at his feet.

"Rin?"

"It's… I'll get it," he said, ducking past Ryuuji only to stop short as the other boy grabbed his wrist.

"Something is bothering you," Ryuuji said simply. Rin's shoulders sagged, and Ryuuji sighed, turning Rin around to face him. Rin wouldn't meet his eyes.

"You still want to do this, don't you?" Ryuuji asked, a hint of uncertainty slipping in to his voice. "Get married?"

"Of course!" Rin said, looking up at Ryuuji with wide eyes. Making him doubt that was the absolute last thing he wanted. "But… this… it's not…" He looked away again.

"Come on," Ryuuji said, taking Rin's hand and guiding him to the couch so he could sit, "Tell me what's wrong."

Rin sighed, looking down as he picked at his hands. "I want to marry you," he said, getting that out of the way first of all so there could be no confusion, "Just… this… it's not…" He gestured to the offending adoption paperwork sitting on the table.

"We talked about this, Rin," Ryuuji said with a sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose. "We can have a religious ceremony, but if we want civil rights, this is the only way we can get them without moving to another country."

"I know…" Rin mumbled, leaning forward and burying his face in his hands, as if he could hide from it.

"I can't leave my family behind, not with my responsibilities, and you said you didn't want to move either. Not when you'd have to leave your family and friends and learn a new language. It's not worth it just for a piece of paper."

"I know."

"But it's important that we be able to do things like have legally joint property, or visitation rights, or power of attorney, or-"

"I know, damn it!"

Ryuuji quieted, backing off and letting Rin take a moment to stew after his outburst.

"I just…" Rin started, "Why do I have to take your name?"

"…That's it?" Ryuuji asked, furrowing his brow, "That's why you haven't submitted the paperwork? You know why you have to take my name."

"You're only four months older than me!" Rin said, throwing his hands up before crossing them over his chest and slumping down on the couch.

Ryuuji didn't argue. Rin knew the tiny gap in their ages didn't matter. One day was all it took, and the older party had to adopt the younger. It was never intended to be a replacement for marriage so it only made sense. Instead Ryuuji walked behind the couch, behind Rin, placing his hands on his shoulders and kissing the top of his head, trying to ease some of the tension out of him.

"What's wrong with my family name anyway?"

Rin sighed. "Nothing… It's just… Shiro gave me my name."

Ryuuji froze. "Oh…" He hadn't even thought about that. Rin certainly hadn't gotten his name from his birth father, and as far as they knew, he'd been given a made up name to protect his identity. "But… Shiro gave you a lot of other things too."

"Like what?"

"Unconditional love and a strong moral compass, to start," Ryuuji said immediately, ignoring Rin's scoff. He'd never even met the man, but he'd heard stories, and frankly, just by knowing Rin he got a sense of what kind of man Shiro had been, and knew he had cared about the two boys immensely and had given them a lot. "When all it took was one outburst or one feat of unnatural strength for others to write you off as a monster, he stuck by you through it all. And I know you don't like to talk about the day he died, but he didn't give up on you. Not even then. He gave his life for you, so you could have a shot at a normal life and be happy. You know that."

"Yeah…" Rin sighed, sinking even deeper in to the couch, his voice melancholy.

"It's not like you'll be forgetting him by changing your name. Everything important is right here," Ryuuji said, placing his hand over Rin's heart. "And here," he kissed the top of Rin's head again.

"I know," Rin said, placing his hand over Ryuuji's and sighing. "I know…"

"Or… We could just not, for now," Ryuuji said with a shrug, trying to be casual. Doing things properly—legally—was important to him, but he didn't want to rush Rin in to something he might end up regretting. "It doesn't really have any impact on us having a religious ceremony with our friends, and there's no rush, not really."

"No, you're right," Rin said with a huff, squaring his shoulders and sitting up straight. "I'll sign the damn paperwork. Gimme' a pen before I change my mind." He held his hand out, palm up, and waited, even though he was closer and Ryuuji had to walk around the couch in order to even reach the pen. Ryuuji rolled his eyes, but said nothing as he got Rin the pen and then watched as the half demon quickly scrawled his name down on the paperwork, his handwriting as messy as ever.

"You wanna' take it to the office together?" Rin asked.

"Whatever you like," Ryuuji said, sitting down next to Rin and ruffling his hair. "Whatever you like."


	4. I Do

Thanks to everyone who's been reading, left reviews, favorites, likes, whatever. ^^

Just a quick reminder that each chapter is supposed to be able to exist as it's own emotional fluff one-shot. The time line is going to start fast forwarding a lot over the next couple of chapters.

* * *

**I Do**

Ryuuji examined himself in the mirror of the tiny church bathroom, adjusted his tie and then undid it, only to tie it again.

He was flushed and sweating in his exorcist regalia, the most formal suit he owned, and was beginning to have trouble breathing. The air in the tiny bathroom felt heavy and thick. He cursed under his breath as he jerked at his collar, loosening his tie only to promptly tighten it. Couldn't get married with a loose tie, or a crooked one, or-

"What the hell is taking you so long?"

Ryuuji looked up sharply, glaring at Izumo as she stormed in to the bathroom. "What the hell? This is the men's room, what are you-"

"Konekomaru and Yukio are busy trying to convince Rin to give up his ring so you can exchange them for the ceremony—something you'd probably have more luck at—and Shima is busy flirting with one of the nuns," she said, rolling her eyes. "Shiemi was also too embarrassed to come in here, which left me. What the hell are you doing? We're all waiting."

She stood, arms crossed over her chest, tapping her foot like a mother, or perhaps a teacher, waiting skeptically to hear what excuse he might offer.

Ryuuji's cheeks colored and he ducked his head, looking back in the mirror.

"My tie is crooked," he mumbled, though the words felt weak even as they left his mouth.

"Oh, for the love of- Let me do it,' she said, grabbing him by the shoulders and forcing him to face her, even though she was almost a full head shorter and weighed less than half as much as him. She gripped the tie, shifting the fabric and tightening it under his chin with a rough jerk of her hands.

"You're not getting cold feet, are you?" she asked.

"No. God, no," Ryuuji said as he slapped her hands away. He looked in the mirror. Well, at least the tie was straight now, but that had only been a superficial problem to begin with. "I just want things to be perfect, and I'm worried something will go wrong."

"You mean like Rin's tie won't be straight."

Ryuuji snorted. "It probably won't be."

And that was her point. Ryuuji knew he was overstressing the issue, like he always did. The ceremony was already imperfect, cobbled together on short notice. He had deliberately not invited his parents because he knew his mother would make a huge deal out of it, and that__everyone__ from Kyoto would have ended up coming, invited or not, and then things would spiral out of control, becoming way more complicated than they had to be. She would be pissed, but she'd get over and then she would be happy for him.

And yet it was all as perfect as it needed to be. They were having a religious ceremony—Nagatomo had offered as soon as he'd heard the news about their engagement, and Mephisto had offered them the use of one of the school's chapels—and their closest friends were there.

They were getting married. Everything else be damned.

He shook his head and then turned to face her again, his usual scowl softening slightly. She planted her hands on her hips and quirked an eyebrow, as if to say "what the hell are you smiling about?" She was one of very few people who never let him get away with anything, and though it had caused him no amount of headaches when he was younger, Ryuuji had eventually come to be thankful for it. He could always trust her to tell the whole truth without sugar coating it, and if she backed you on something, she did it wholeheartedly. And she was there right now.

"So, are you about done, or what?

"Yeah," he chuckled, "I think so. Thanks."

"For what?"

"Being yourself I guess," he shrugged, exiting the bathroom even as she cursed him out for that innocuous comment, but he stopped short as he entered the chapel.

Sunlight was pouring in through the old stained glass windows, illuminating his friends and loved ones with brilliant, colored light. Rin was still arguing with his brother, but he looked up as Ryuuji entered and smiled at him. In that instant Ryuuji could have cared less about all the little details that had felt overwhelming moments ago. Rin was here, willing and waiting, unquestioning, and Ryuuji knew he had nothing to worry about. Not crooked ties or creased uniforms, or what anyone might think of the two of them.

He breathed slowly, unable to tear his eyes away from Rin. His chest swelled and he began to feel short of breath again, but this time he wasn't worried. He didn't know what it was—uniforms aside, it's not like they were wearing fancy clothes, or had been made up inordinately compared to how they normally looked—but Rin had never looked more handsome to him than he did right then, standing there at the front of the chapel as Ryuuji approached the group. Perhaps it was just the way Rin smiled at him knowing that this was finally happening.

They were getting married and it was in a way so much more meaningful to Rin than a piece of paper or government approval could ever make it.

As Ryuuji reached the group Rin finally slid his ring off and handed it to Konekomaru, urging him to be careful with it while Yukio rolled his eyes and Konekomaru reminded him he'd be getting it back within ten minutes and there was virtually no way he could lose it in such a short span of time.

"You can just leave it on if you want," Ryuuji said.

"Are you sure?"

The question came from more than one person, and Ryuuji grit his teeth, ignoring the way they stared at him as if he'd been replaced by an imposter as he took his place at the front of the chapel.

"Yes. That's not the important part of the ceremony anyways," Ryuuji ground out, waving them off, "Are we doing this or not?"

Rin blinked before grabbing his ring back from Konekomaru. He slipped it back on before hurrying to stand beside Ryuuji and then smiled up at him.

"Ready to get started?" Nagatomo asked, taking up position in front of them as a quiet hush fell over the rest of the group.

* * *

"You may now kiss the… groom," Nagatomo said, finalizing the ceremony as the small crowd erupted in to applause. Rin and Ryuuji kissed briefly as Shiemi showered them with flower petals and they slowly pulled apart, caught up in each other's eyes, but conscious of the small crowd they had.

They turned to face their friends, still holding hands, smiles etched deep on their faces, when Rin stepped forward and thrust their joined fists in to the air.

"Married in the eyes of God! No more living in sin!"

Ryuuji turned to stare at him, his hand still held aloft, and face palmed.


	5. Old Habits

Thanks to everyone for the reviews. Glad most of you got a laugh out of the last chapter.

As I said before the timeline is moving forward. This little ficlet could technically go anywhere in the timeline, but I'm putting it here. Hope you enjoy.

* * *

**Old Habits**

Ryuuji cracked his eyes open and peered through the darkness at his alarm clock. 5:30 a.m. on the dot. He didn't even have to set an alarm, not that Rin would let him set one for "such an ungodly hour". Those were Rin's words of course. He teased Ryuuji about it and sometimes even fretted over the fact that Ryuuji still got up so early even when he was working long hours and was usually fighting fatigue.

Why not sleep later when he had the chance?

Habit.

Ryuuji woke early every day, all these years later, alarm or no, and there was no point wasting waking hours when he was already so strapped for them anyways. Of course, Rin would say that time spent recharging wasn't wasted at all.

The half demon in question was currently sprawled across his half of the bed, his arm thrown haphazardly across Ryuuji's chest as he snored, still oblivious to the world.

It was Sunday. They'd be on call—they were always on call—but neither of them had any scheduled missions, and nobody went in to the office on Sundays, except the auxiliary staff. They didn't have to go to the office, or write reports, or consult on any demon related activities. They could sleep in if they wanted to.

Still, Ryuuji slipped out from under Rin's arm, not even bothering to be all that careful—Rin was usually a heavy sleeper, but he occasionally surprised Ryuuji with how aware he was of his surroundings in spite of seeming dead to the world.

Ryuuji dressed quietly in the darkness. He went to the bathroom, brushed his teeth, and pinned his hair up out of his eyes. He made his way to the kitchen where he filled their coffee maker with fresh grounds and set the machine on a one hour timer. He then grabbed his iPod, put on his running shoes, and left the apartment. Five minutes of stretching later and he was running.

As his feet hit the pavement he concentrated on his breathing, taking deep, even breaths. In, out. In, out. He didn't even really listen to his music—not consciously. It was just there to help as a buffer against the outside world. It was just him and the streets; his mind and his body, and the feel of blood pounding through his veins as he pushed his body to its limits.

The city was just starting to wake up, the sun itself just barely cresting the horizon to warm everything it touched. There was virtually no one else around except for the odd few other early birds—people like him. There were no crowds milling about the streets to block his path, no cars to fill the air with noise or smog. This was his time. He did it as much for the mental clarity and sense of freedom as he did it to keep his strength and health in good condition. As much as he loved Rin, the boy was a powerhouse of wild energy, taking over any space he occupied, even when he slept. It could be draining, but Ryuuji had to admit it was also fun. Rin gave his life… well… "Life", but the quiet contemplation of this meditation gave him the clarity he needed to refresh himself, both mentally and physically, and really appreciate everything he had.

He returned to their apartment drenched in sweat—his clothes soaked through and sticking to his body—yet feeling wonderfully exhausted and alive. The smell of fresh coffee filled their tiny apartment, but Ryuuji ignored it as he headed for their bathroom, undressing and throwing his clothes in to the hamper before hopping in the shower. When he was finished and dry, he put a pair of fresh boxers on, poured himself a cup of coffee, and returned to bed.

Rin was sprawled out diagonally across the bed now, taking advantage of the extra space, but when Ryuuji set his mug down on the bedside table the clink of porcelain against wood was like a signal and Rin rolled to the side, taking all the blankets with him yet making room for Ryuuji. Ryuuji climbed back in to bed, leaning against the headboard, and Rin immediately curled up at his side, throwing a leg over his hip.

"Mornin'," Rin said, his words muffled against Ryuuji's skin, "Welcome back."

"Thanks," Ryuuji said, running his fingers through Rin's hair. "Go back to sleep."

"M'kay…" And just like that, Rin was out like a light, snoring softly as if he'd never been disturbed, his heart beating peacefully against Ryuuji's chest. Ryuuji wrapped his arm around Rin's shoulders, kissed the top of his head, and grabbed his coffee and a book from the bedside table.

Old habits died hard, but that didn't mean you couldn't make new ones.


	6. Love Isn't All Sunshine and Roses

This website is being a butt and showing zeros across the board for this fics statistics for some reason. Still getting the reviews of course, so thank you very much for those. :x

* * *

**Love Isn't All Sunshine and Roses; Sometimes it's Fire and Takeout**

It had been another long day and Ryuuji sighed as he made his way up to their apartment. A meal, a long bath, and then sleep would go a long way towards making him feel alive again.

Ryuuji closed the door to their apartment behind him and took his boots off, putting them in their place in the shoe rack before entering the apartment proper where he promptly tripped over Rin's boots. He stumbled, and then cursed under his breath as he placed Rin's boots in the shoe rack next to his own.

He then made his way down the hall, stooping to pick up Rin's dirty socks, only to look up, his eyes narrowing as he realized Rin had left a trail of dirty clothing on his way through their apartment. His shirt and pants lay further down the hall and his jacket was slung over the arm of their living room couch.

Ryuuji glanced in to the bathroom, which was currently empty, but signs of Rin's destruction were everywhere—a damp towel lay on the floor and Rin's personal bath care products crowded the sink. Ryuuji grit his teeth, his blood pressure rising by the second, and threw the towel in the hamper with the rest of Rin's dirty clothes before continuing through the apartment.

"Could you not fucking pick up after yourself?" Ryuuji called out as he approached the kitchen, the smell of food finally hitting him. He rounded the corner, another curse on the tip of his tongue, and stopped dead. Rin looked up at him with wide eyes, caught off guard and wearing nothing but a pink apron. Was he fucking serious?

"Sorry," Rin said, laughing nervously, "I wanted to make sure I had dinner ready by the time you got home."

"It would take you all of a fucking second to put your shit away where it belongs."

"I… I said I was sorry," Rin said, visibly wilting, his tail falling limp to curl around his leg. He stopped what he was working on, holding his spatula in front of himself, feeling suddenly vulnerable and regretting his decision to surprise Ryuuji by wearing only an apron.

"With the hours I pull do you think the first thing I wanna' do when I get home is pick up after your shit?"

"W-well, laundry is your job," Rin said, his grip on the spatula tightening. Now his hackles were up. He had passed through apologetic and right in to defensive anger. "I do all the cooking and you don't hear me fucking complain!"

"Oh yeah?" Ryuuji asked, scoffing lightly as he stepped in to the kitchen and jabbed his finger against Rin's chest as he towered over him, "That doesn't mean you can't use a god damn hamper instead of leaving your mess all over the floor! I'm not your fucking maid! Besides, you enjoy cooking!"

"That doesn't mean a fucking "Thank you" or a home cooked meal from you now and then wouldn't be nice."

"That's not fair. You know I can't cook nearly as good as you and you always leave work earlier than me."

"Well I guess you shouldn't even fucking try then, huh? Like me?" Blue flame licked at Rin's skin and Ryuuji took a step back, realizing he'd pushed him across a line. "Cuz' I apparently can't do anything fucking right!"

Rin grabbed the pot off the stove and threw it—dinner and all—out the kitchen window. Both of them froze; a tense silence hanging in the air until the quiet clatter of the pot hitting the street filtered up through the window. Rin's shoulders sagged.

"Sorry…" he mumbled, his back to Ryuuji, his shoulders shaking, his flames extinguished. "Sorry. I-I'm sorry. I'm such a fuck up."

"No… Rin, I'm sorry. You know that's not what I meant." Ryuuji reached out to him, but hesitated. He'd clearly hit a nerve, but it was one he'd never realized was so raw.

"Why didn't you tell me you felt that way about cooking all the time?"

"Because I do enjoy it and you… You work so hard, all the time. I didn't want to complain. I just-"

"Look," Ryuuji said, placing his hand on Rin's shoulder, "Why don't you go put some clothes on and go rescue that pot before someone runs it over, and I'll finish making dinner."

"O-okay…"

"And Rin?" Ryuuji said before Rin could leave the kitchen. The half demon didn't look up, but he stopped, listening.

"Don't call yourself a fuck up."

Rin looked up at him then, his eyes wide, his mouth working slowly, but Ryuuji held up his hand as he continued.

"I've never thought that about you. You get on my nerves sometimes, but I'm just... really tired…" he sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, "But I overreacted. I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I'm sorry."

Rin smiled then, a weak, lopsided grin, and he leaned in against Ryuuji, pressing his head against his shoulder.

"I'm sorry too," he said, his voice soft, "You're right. I could have put all that stuff away, but I was being lazy. I'll… I'll try not to do it so much."

"That's all I'm asking," Ryuuji said as he kissed the top of Rin's head.

* * *

Thirty minutes later black smoke was pouring out of the microwave. Ryuuji stood on a kitchen chair, trying to silence the screech of the fire alarm while Rin fanned the smoke out the window with a damp dish rag.

The kitchen fell suddenly silent except for the sound of their coughing, and Ryuuji stepped down from the chair, his ears ringing. He heaved a large sigh, letting all the air go out of him, and then turned towards Rin.

"How's about every so often I surprise you with takeout?"

Rin coughed, trying to hide his smile. "Sounds good…"


	7. Lunch Break

I'd like to take a minute, so sit right there, while I thank the people who've been continually leaving reviews rather than just giving a generic shout out like I always do.

Ern Estine 12624, AnonymousIDK, Evilneko101, and loserbooknerd: Thank you guys so much for sticking with this series of mostly super mushy, sometimes angsty, short stories. Thanks to everyone else too of course, even the people who aren't leaving reviews. I obsessively watch my story stats so I know there's a lot more of you out there.

This story is about the soulless grind of office work. :) I took inspiration from The Sorrows of Okumura Yukio: The Salaryman Exorcist. Ya'll should check it out if you didn't know of it's existence.

* * *

**Lunch Break**

Ryuuji leaned back in his chair, massaging his temples, and then glanced up at the clock. It was almost lunch time. That meant he would soon get a short break, and then it was back to work for at least another four hours, if he didn't get roped in to pulling anymore overtime.

He looked back down at his desk, everything neatly in its place: pencils, pens, and other office supplies to one side; photos on the other: one of his parents, and one of him and Rin from their wedding, with a smaller picture of all the Exwires from back in high school tucked in the corner of the frame. The pile of paperwork in his IN box was significantly bigger than the pile in his OUT box—overtime looking more and more likely—and his current project sat smack dab in the center of his desk, right in front of him—the source of his current headache.

Dear god, he felt almost guilty. He had no idea how much trouble they had probably caused everyone when they were younger. Oh, he had some idea—they had caused a lot of trouble—but he'd never quite grasped the full extent.

The assignment in question was the mission debriefing and all related paperwork concerning the recent training mission for the latest batch of Exwires. One of the tamers had lost control of their familiars and the building had been set on fire and had to be evacuated. Senior exorcists had to be called in to subdue what was otherwise supposed to be a routine cleanup job, and one of the students had been injured, though not seriously.

Pretty tame from what Ryuuji remembered of his Exwire days.

Except now he had to draft a formal apology letter to the client and the owners of the building, field phone calls from angry parents, and deal with a mountain of insurance forms. This was not what he signed up for at all when he first decided to become an exorcist and join the True Cross Order.

Is this what Yukio had to deal with on top of teaching them and going to school himself? Damn it, he was almost envious of Rin for still being lower first class. At least he was still primarily doing fieldwork.

Ryuuji still did field work too of course, but it was mainly overseeing lower class exorcists unless a higher ranked demon needed exorcising, and it was starting to feel almost like more paperwork than actual work. The higher rank paid better and less fieldwork meant less chances of getting hurt, but god damn it was boring and it was far from glamorous, not that glamour was something he was after, but... Ryuuji sighed. Sometimes his old goals of defeating Satan and restoring his temple to its former glory felt impossibly far away, even if ass kissing and rank climbing was one of the better ways of achieving it. It opened more doors for him, and it's not like they'd ever take lower ranked exorcist on a mission to fight Satan if they ever got around to it—Rin being the obvious exception.

Ryuuji sighed and looked back up at the clock. Almost lunch time, almost lunch time…

Okay, where the hell was Rin? They always ate lunch together—not to mention Ryuuji didn't even normally have his food until Rin brought it to him because he left for work earlier than the other man—and now it was lunchtime and Rin was late.

Ryuuji had to resist the urge to fidget, and wondered if he should maybe try to rush through another insurance form before the other man arrived when Rin finally rounded the corner, his eyes lighting up as he spotted Ryuuji.

"You're late," Ryuuji said.

"Good to see you too." Rin ignored his husband's grumpiness in favor of kissing him on the nose and enjoying the way his cheeks colored. He pulled up a spare chair and sat down at Ryuuji's desk. "I had to give Yukio his lunch first and he wasn't at his desk so I had to ask around a bit."

"You still make Yukio's lunch?" Ryuuji asked, his brow furrowing. "How long have you been doing that?"

Rin looked confused for a second, pausing as he unpacked the lunches—two bento boxes wrapped in neat little kerchiefs. "I thought you knew I did that. I've been doing it since high school…"

"Seriously? I mean, I knew you did it back then, but I had no idea you were still doing it. Are we paying for that?"

"No," Rin said rolling his eyes, "He slips me some money every other week to cover it, like a car pool, except for food."

Ryuuji stared at Rin, trying to determine if he was joking or not, and then shook his head. "That guy needs to get his own wife," he grumbled under his breath.

"The hell'd you just say?" Rin asked, jabbing his chopsticks at Ryuuji, "Because it sounded like you said you don't want me to keep making your lunches."

"That's not-" Ryuuji sputtered, "I didn't mean to imply…"

"You'd better damn well not. Besides, you're the one that does all the cleaning and the nagging."

Ryuuji shot him a glare, but snapped his mouth shut, not wanting to prove Rin right and simply let the argument die instead. He ducked his head and reached for his lunch, popping the small box open to make himself look busy, only to pause and stare at it, a deep blush rising on his cheeks.

Hearts. Big pink hearts everywhere.

As much as Rin was able, the lunch was heart themed. The rice was pink—maybe he'd dyed it somehow? Maybe pink rice was a thing? Ryuuji had no idea—and he'd made heart shaped rice balls, and all the side food—carrots, cherry tomatoes, and strawberries—had been sliced on the angle and assembled with tooth picks to form hearts as well.

He glanced up at Rin to find the other man staring at him, his arms folded over his chest.

"You got something you wanna' say?" Rin asked, one eyebrow raised as if challenging Ryuuji to just go ahead and dare make a comment like the last one.

Ryuuji glanced down at Rin's lunch—completely normal looking—and then back up at Rin. It was impressive in and of itself that Rin could serve him food like that with a straight face, but Ryuuji held his tongue. He knew better than to bite the hand that fed him.

"Thanks for the food," he mumbled instead as he started to eat.

Rin flashed a grin at him, wagging his tail and causing a few onlookers to stare.

No matter how long Rin worked for the True Cross Order it seemed as if there would always be people uncomfortable with his presence. Some people had even made a few choice comments to Ryuuji about it, as if they were too scared to speak to Rin directly, though Ryuuji always tried to correct them politely. He didn't think they deserved the politeness, but this was a professional work place and freaking out at people wouldn't help Rin's reputation any.

Ryuuji sighed through his nose as he ate.

"Whatcha' thinking about?"

"Uh, nothing," Ryuuji lied. It was nothing Rin needed to hear anyway.

Instead of questioning him further, Rin reached over and speared one of Ryuuji's strawberries with his chopsticks, and then held it up for him to eat. Ryuuji leaned back, narrowing his eyes.

"Not at work," he said, his eyes darting about, knowing they already had an audience.

Rin's smile only grew as he leaned forward, holding the chopsticks closer, so Ryuuji snatched them from his hand, eating the food himself before Rin could press the issue further.

"Aw, you know you love it."

Ryuuji snorted, but didn't deny it. He hated the attention that Rin brought him, but he'd never give it up. As far as he was concerned Rin didn't owe these people anything.

He grabbed one of the pink rice balls, holding it up and staring at it, admiring the effort that had gone in to shaping it. Even if it was easy, it was an extra unnecessary step that had been taken just for him.

"I was just thinking…" he trailed off, staring at Rin as the half demon looked up at him mid-chew.

"I was just thinking that I'm the luckiest guy in this office," Ryuuji finished, trying to fight down the embarrassment he felt at saying something so openly cheesy.

But the smile that spread across Rin's face—not one of his cheeky, teasing grins, but an honest, eager, heartfelt smile that grew up right out of the core of his being—made it worth it. It would always be worth it.


	8. Territory

So, this and a future chapter are bumping up the rating on this story for sexual content. Nothing is described in graphic detail though, it's all pretty much fade to black, but I do try to keep that stuff over on AO3.

Thanks as always for your comments. :)

* * *

**Territory**

Rin checked his pockets, making sure he had his phone and wallet and whatever else he needed to take home, then arranged the papers on his desk in to two stacks, more or less. He glanced up at the clock, his body thrumming with trapped energy as he watched it tick down the last few seconds to five o'clock. As soon as the long hand of the clock made contact Rin was up and out of his chair, grabbing the smaller of the two stacks of paper to take it to filing on his way out of the building. He was halfway out the door when he stopped short, a vibration in his pocket grabbing his attention, and he pulled out his phone to see a text from Ryuuji.

I've been invited out to drink after work with some of the other middle class exorcists. I'll be home late so you don't need to cook for me.

Rin pouted as he shoved his phone back in to his pocket, but he wasn't about to complain. It was, in a manner of speaking, sort of (mostly) his own fault that he hadn't ranked up as fast as Ryuuji had. Ryuuji pushed him to pick up an extra meister, even citing him as a shoe in for tamer class, but it was precisely because Ryuuji put in so much effort, overtime, and went to networking events like this that he got on so well with the higher-ups and the rest of their coworkers. It certainly didn't hurt that he was a human, and from a good family too.

Well, whatever… Rin put in overtime too, sometimes… In fact he'd be putting in overtime tomorrow with an overnight field mission; exactly the kind of overtime he liked, as long as it wasn't too boring. Not paperwork though… There was always paperwork. It was literally never ending, so he didn't mind if it sat and waited its turn to get done. As long as he got it done before people started to complain he was good, and he rarely left it that long… Usually.

Well, whatever. He'd just have dinner with Kuro and package up the left overs for lunch tomorrow.

That was exactly what he was doing, sitting on the couch and watching TV with Kuro, his mouth half full of food, when he heard Ryuuji's key in the lock. He got up quickly, trying to hide the evidence that he was eating in the living room and peeked out in to the hallway.

"You're home early."

"Um…" Ryuuji spun to face him, and blushed, glancing down like he'd just been caught doing something he wasn't supposed to. He licked his lips, collecting his thoughts. "It turned out… It wasn't really a work networking thing…"

"No?" Rin asked, not failing to notice the way Ryuuji fidgeted, his blush rising to trail down his neck and ears, or the way he left out exactly what the event had actually been. "So what was it?"

"It was… Just me and Watanabe Chise," he said, and when Rin narrowed his eyes he quickly added, "But she was very apologetic when I told her I was married and I left right away."

"Watanabe? That's the tamer, right? Brown hair?"

"Uh… Yes," Ryuuji said, a little caught off guard by Rin's nonchalance. "You're not mad?"

"Why would I be mad at you?" Rin said stretching up to lay his arms over Ryuuji's shoulders, kissing him briefly. "And her? Well, if anything I have to compliment her. She clearly has good taste."

Ryuuji scoffed lightly, but visibly relaxed, leaning down to kiss Rin again.

"But if you're feeling guilty you can make it up to me," Rin said as he wiggled his eyebrows, his voice dipping low as he moved down to kiss Ryuuji's neck.

Ryuuji's only response was to hum low in his throat as he wrapped his arms around Rin, pulling the half demon's body against his own.

* * *

When Ryuuji woke the next morning it was to more pain than he was used to accompanying a night of vigorous sex—some ache was expected, but this was beyond normal. Peeling away from the sheets opened up fresh scabs along his back where Rin had raked him with his nails, and the freshly bared flesh protested the movement. Ryuuji sat on the edge of the bed and rolled his shoulders, taking stock of the damage and then tentatively reached for his neck. The skin was tender there too, feeling bruised, and when he dragged himself in to the bathroom and flicked on the light, he realized why.

His neck and chest were covered in hickies. More than one of the small purple bruises was too high up for his shirt collar to cover. There were even a few bite marks.

Ryuuji sighed and rubbed his neck. Biting and scratching was not that unusual. Rin could get very in to sex, and it made Ryuuji feel powerful that he could have that effect on him, even though deep down he knew that for Rin it was always a controlled fall, but Rin was usually careful with where he placed them. This, on the other hand, was a very clear and deliberate attempt to mark him, and Ryuuji felt almost as if he had walked blindly in to a devious trap which had been baited with only the most delectable of temptations.

He leaned back, stealing a glance out the bathroom door at the other boy who was still soundly asleep, completely untroubled by the world, and shook his head.

* * *

When Ryuuji returned from his jog it was his intention to head straight for the shower, to finish of his morning routine as usual, but a noise drew his attention and he detoured to the kitchen. Rin was up, awake well ahead of his normal schedule, and busy cooking.

"You're up early," Ryuuji said as he slipped in to the kitchen, setting his iPod down on the kitchen table. The mouth-watering smell of breakfast filled the air and Ryuuji's stomach rumbled, reminding him he hadn't eaten since lunch yesterday.

"Good morning," Rin said, his voice unusually bright and cheerful for the early hour. He turned and placed a plate of food on the table in front of Ryuuji before turning back to the stove. "You missed dinner last night, right? And I won't be around tonight to cook so I'm making you something now."

The kitchen counter did contain a lot more than Rin usually used for one meal, and two wrapped bento boxes already sat to the side, neatly ready to go along with them to work, but something simply felt off to Ryuuji. He couldn't complain though, and his stomach once again reminded him of just how hungry he was so he sat and started to eat.

"I was thinking of maybe pursuing a meister in tamer after all," Rin said.

There it was.

"This isn't because of Watanabe hitting on me, is it?"

"What? No."

"Good, because I've been nagging you to try for another meister for months. You've been taking Kuro on missions for years; you'd pass for sure. I just think it's a little weird that you've been so resistant, and suddenly a tamer in my division hits on me and now you're actually considering it."

"Well, it's got nothing to do with that, okay?"

"Okay," Ryuuji said, shrugging, "If you say so."

When he was finished eating he placed his dishes in the sink and watched Rin for a moment as he finished packing up the rest of the food he'd made, setting the dishes aside to be cleaned.

"What?" Rin asked when he realized he was being watched.

Ryuuji shrugged. "Nothing."

"Then you'd better go have your shower," Rin said, "I might not mind the smell, but I don't think our coworkers will share the sentiment." Rin pressed his face to Ryuuji's neck and licked the column of this throat, tasting his sweat.

"On second thought…" Rin grabbed Ryuuji by the hips and lifted him on to the table. Ryuuji gaped at him, always caught off guard when Rin used his unnatural strength against him.

"W-wait a sec-"

Rin ignored him, tugging Ryuuji's pants off and swiftly kneeling between his legs. Ryuuji's protests melted away at the first touch of Rin's tongue.

* * *

When Ryuuji hopped down from the kitchen table fifteen minutes later his legs felt like jelly and it was all he could do to hobble in to the shower and lean his head against the wall as he let the hot water course over him, stinging his back, but soothing his aching muscles.

He could only speculate at what his punishment would be if he actually had cheated on Rin, and wondered how much more of this he could take. Rin had said he wasn't mad, but he was clearly bothered by what had happened even if he wouldn't admit it.

When he finished his shower and dried himself off, he returned to the kitchen to find Rin cleaning up the last of his mess, humming quietly to himself as if nothing at all was wrong. Ryuuji stood in the hallway, quietly watching Rin as he considered how to broach the subject. Leaning against the door frame with his arms crossed over his chest, he eventually came to the conclusion that the best way to do it was 'directly'.

"Rin, you don't think I would ever cheat on you, do you?"

"What?!" Rin said, looking hurt, "Of course not! I-"

"Because you're certainly acting like it, marking me up, inside and out," he said, pulling the collar of his shirt down to emphasize the hickies and bite marks.

Rin floundered, his mouth opening and closing silently before he looked down at the floor, unable to meet Ryuuji's eyes. He flinched as Ryuuji strode towards him and then placed his hand on his head, ruffling his hair. Rin's cheeks burned, but he didn't push Ryuuji's hand away. He did finally look up at him from beneath his bangs.

"I don't think you'd cheat on me," he said, his voice weak, "You didn't do anything wrong."

"That doesn't mean you can't be upset about what happened."

Rin didn't respond, just hunching in on himself.

"If it upsets you, just say so."

Rin clenched his fists. "… How did she not know we're married?"

Ryuuji shrugged, letting his hand slide down from Rin's head to rest between his shoulder blades and pull him against his chest. "She transferred in only a few months ago and… Well, she's not exactly the sharpest knife in the block and in any case she knows now. If it helps, she was incredibly embarrassed when I told her."

"It helps a little," Rin said, a small smile creeping on to his face. "I'm a bit disappointed I won't get to see the look on her face when she notices your neck."

"Yeah…" Ryuuji said, the humor going out of his voice, "Don't ever mark me like this again."

"… What about for fun?"

Ryuuji just sighed.


	9. Pick Your Battles

It might not seem like it yet, because I still haven't even published half the chapters I've already written, but I was starting to feel like I had an inordinate amount of chapters where Rin has a problem or gets moody and Ryuuji fixes things, and I didn't really like that, 'cuz Rin is a grown ass man who can solve his own problems. Of course Ryuuji's going to want to help anyways, but not every problem has a solution and Ryuuji needs to not take it personally.

Also I didn't realize it until after the fact, but upping the rating on this story for the last chapter makes it so it doesn't show up under the basic category view unless you change the filters. Remember, I update every Friday (...And I try to do it before midnight, lol) and you can Follow to be notified of updates.

Thanks as always for reading and reviewing. :3

* * *

**Pick Your Battles**

They stood together in their tiny kitchen, Ryuuji's knuckles turning white as he clutched at the piece of paper in his hands, creasing it even as he stopped himself from crumpling it in to a ball and hurling it across the room.

"That's mine," Rin said, softly reminding Ryuuji as he eased his hands open, taking the document from him and laying it down on the kitchen table, smoothing it out.

"Rin…" Ryuuji's voice was hoarse, a barely restrained growl.

"Good as new," Rin said, ignoring Ryuuji's tone and holding the document up proudly.

"This is bullshit and you know it."

Rin finally frowned, lowering the document as he turned to look at Ryuuji. The document itself was the source of his happiness—misplaced happiness if Ryuuji had any say—and the source of Ryuuji's anger. It was official certification from the Order that he'd been awarded a meister in Tamer and the rank of Middle Second Class Exorcist.

"Don't pretend like you're happy," Ryuuji said, clenching his fists at his side.

Rin took a deep breath and forced a tired smile. "Aren't you proud of me?"

"What? O-of course I am," Ryuuji said, his anger wavering, "We both know you aced the exam, and the amount of hours you've put in over the years, your mission profile—You should have gotten Middle First Class!"

"Maybe," Rin said, smiling weakly, "But I think this is good enough for now."

"Like hell it is," Ryuuji said, turning on his heel, "I'm going right now to file a formal complaint about thi-!" Ryuuji choked on the last word as Rin grabbed the collar of his shirt, stopping him short and pulling him back. He turned, rubbing his throat and ready to get in to a shouting match, but a sharp glare from Rin cut him off.

"The absolute last thing you're going to do is damage your own career on my behalf."

"I don't care if it damages my career! I'm not going to let them treat you like this, it isn't fair-"

"My life isn't fair," Rin cut in, throwing his hands up, "I didn't ask to be born. I didn't ask to be a half demon, or to have people hate me for who my father is, but I am and they do, and I've been dealing with it my whole life and I don't need you fighting my battles for me. I will take the victories where I can get them, and this-" he said, holding up the certificate, his own tight grip creasing the edges this time, "-is a victory."

Ryuuji stood silently, floundering, caught between the overwhelming desire to do something, anything, and the frustrating inability to help his husband, and feeling almost ashamed he'd even thought he could help in the first place, as if Rin was a child who couldn't deal with his own issues. He bowed his head.

"I'm sorry," Ryuuji said softly, "But…You're still aiming for Paladin, aren't you?"

"Yeah, I still wanna' be Paladin," Rin said, "But… Maybe I can get Dragoon, if I try hard enough. Hey, maybe you could help me practice… But Aria? Doctor? You and me both know I'd be a hopeless case for either meister." Rin sighed, his body sagging as the fight left him only to be replaced by the constant melancholy he fought off on a day to day basis.

"I didn't tell you," Rin continued, "But… My exam results came back two weeks ago."

"What?" Ryuuji asked looking up at him, "Why didn't you-"

"They failed me."

Ryuuji gaped at him. "That's-"

"Bullshit, I know. You said it—we both know I aced the exam, but I had to get Mephisto to pull strings just to get this, so…" he trailed off.

"So this is a victory," Ryuuji said, finally acquiescing. He knew Rin had it rough—he'd been there for most of the worst of it—but he had no idea how much the problem still persisted. Had Rin's hesitation to even take the tamer exam stemmed from the fear that something like this would inevitably happen? And here Ryuuji had chalked it up to laziness. He grimaced down at the floor, feeling like a helpless ass.

Rin nodded solemnly. "So Paladin? I dunno'," he shrugged, "But I'm not gonna' stop trying, and you can bet your ass I'm still gonna' be there when we finally fight Satan—I wouldn't give that up for nothing—but I'm also gonna' quietly toe the line while I get this certificate framed and hang it by my desk and let it serve as a constant spiteful reminder that they haven't gotten rid of me yet."

Ryuuji snorted, but even under Rin's forcefully determined veneer he could see the cracks forming, the slight tremble beneath his skin. Maybe he couldn't fix the problems Rin had been dealing with his entire life, maybe it wasn't even his place to try, but… He sure as hell wasn't going to sit by and do nothing while Rin tried to carry the weight of the unfairness of his own life on his shoulders.

"So, if this is a victory," Ryuuji said, "that means we celebrate."

Rin looked up at him, the crease in his brow easing slightly, and Ryuuji took the certificate from him, slapping it down on the table and forcing a grin for Rin's sake as he threw his arm around his shoulder.

"My husband just got a job advancement so I'm taking him out to dinner, anywhere he likes!"

Rin's mouth popped open in a silent gasp, his eyes dancing, and Ryuuji could almost see the gears in Rin's mind shift as drool began to form.

"Sukiyaki!" Rin shouted, throwing his arms in to the air as he ran to put on his coat and shoes.

Ryuuji just quietly shook his head, smiling softly to himself as he followed.

Not being able to solve Rin's problems felt almost like a failure on his part. Simply being by his side to support him didn't feel like enough—not when he wanted to march in to the Vatican and strangle the Grigori members themselves for hurting his husband—but it would have to be. Being there for Rin, simply to support him was the absolute least he could do, and if it made Rin happy, then maybe that could be enough.


	10. Puppies

An incredibly early update this week, because I'm going away and won't have access to my computer, so I hope you all enjoy this mid-week surprise.

Thanks as always for reading and reviewing. :3

* * *

**Puppies**

The spiralling tiers of True Cross Town cast the city into darkness in the early hours of evening, the setting sun covering what it could reach in soft red light. Rin and Ryuuji walked side by side, each carrying two bags of groceries as they headed home after a long day.

"There's a dragoon teaching position open. I was thinking of applying," Ryuuji said, "it's a lateral move though. Doesn't pay any more, but at least it will get me out from behind my desk more often and the hours should be steady, though I'll probably be bringing more work home. What do you think?"

No answer came. Ryuuji looked up, realizing Rin was no longer beside him, and turned to find Rin a few yards behind, staring into the darkened window of some shop.

"Rin?"

He didn't look up, instead pressing his face closer to the window which turned out to belong to a pet store. The store was closed and the shop was dark. No animals could be seen from outside.

"Can we get a puppy?" He asked.

Ryuuji furrowed his brow and frowned. "Are we moving? Because you know our current place doesn't allow pets." Kuro notwithstanding. Ryuuji didn't normally break the rules, but Kuro wasn't technically a pet, let alone a cat.

Rin snorted and turned away from the window without another word, not bothering to put up a fight. Ryuuji pursed his lips as he watched Rin walk away for a moment, quietly wondering what had brought on that request. Rin hadn't shown much interest in animals before and though Kuro wasn't technically a pet, he seemed to fill the role quite well, showing up for regular meals and affection, though Ryuuji still wasn't sure how he got in and out of their apartment without help, and more importantly, without drawing unwanted attention from their landlord.

Ryuuji shook his head and hurried to catch up.

"Did you hear what I said before? About applying for the teaching position?"

"Yeah… I don't normally like it when you work at home, but it would be nice to get to spend more time together…" Rin opened his mouth as if to say more, but then pursed his lips, looking down at his feet as he walked. "You like kids?" Rin asked.

Ryuuji shrugged. "I can take em' or leave em', but maybe-" he cut himself off, swallowing his words. He'd been about to suggest Rin watch for a teaching position to open up for either tamers or knights, but that… That would be a bad idea. Not Rin teaching—he'd probably be good at it, at dealing with the kids. He liked them—but they both knew he'd never get picked for the job. Better not to even mention it, putting the idea in to his head only to get his hopes up.

Ryuuji coughed, trying to cover his awkward shift in speech. "Kids are okay, but considering what our teachers went through, I imagine it should be easy by comparison. What are the chances of that happening again?"

Rin grunted noncommittally, hesitated, and then deviated away from the path home once more.

"I didn't mean you," Ryuuji said, calling after him, "We all gave them hell. I don't know what it was. It was like the worst possible luck that they ended up with an entire batch of trainees who all had ulterior motives for joining the program."

Rin didn't answer so Ryuuji followed him into what turned out to be a small neighbourhood park; deserted in the twilight hours. Rin put the grocery bags down and then took a seat on one of the swings, his boots crunching hard against the gravel as he kicked off. The creak of the old rusty chains sang loudly as Ryuuji stood by, watching him.

"This…" Ryuuji said, referring to Rin's unnatural silence and the way he sat, head down, eyes forward, "This isn't really about wanting a dog, is it?"

Ryuuji set down the bags he was carrying and took a seat in the swing next to Rin. The old tired rubber conformed to him as he sat, the cold leeching in to his skin through his clothes.

Rin shrugged. "No, but... I thought it might help."

"Help what?"

"Fill the void, you know? You ever think about having kids?"

"I-" Ryuuji blinked and snapped his mouth shut. The conversation had just taken a turn in to unexpectedly serious territory. This was not something they'd ever spoken about before.

"To be honest," he said, scratching the back of his neck as he started off slow, thinking carefully about his words, "I think a small part of me always just assumed it would happen, but I was always so focused on reviving my temple, I never put too much thought in to it."

Rin hummed thoughtfully, pushing himself even higher on the swing.

"I guess I'm kinda' the opposite," Rin said, "When I was really young I thought I'd love to be a dad—like the thought of having another kid just like me to play with, to protect, to teach and help grow. It seemed like a dream come true—but as I got older, and all my teachers hated me, and none of the other parents would let their kids play with me even if they had wanted to, and I dropped out of school... I just... I didn't even think it was an option anymore."

"Rin…"

Damn it. What the hell was he supposed to say? Ryuuji hadn't been exaggerating when he said he'd never thought about it. He honestly had no idea how kids were supposed to fit in to their current lives.

"Lately… I've been thinking-"

"Rin, I don't think it would be a good idea. We're both-"

Rin put his feet out, halting his motion with a loud spray of gravel, and turned to glare at Ryuuji.

"I'm not an idiot. I know we can't make a kid, but that doesn't mean we can't get one."

Ryuuji arched an eyebrow, peering at Rin out of the corner of his eye. "I was going to say we both work dangerous on call jobs with long erratic hours, but the way you said that is a little disconcerting."

Rin sighed, letting his head fall back and gazing up at the darkened sky.

"I don't know what that means, but I'm thinking it's a 'no'."

"It's not a 'no', per se," Ryuuji said, fidgeting, "This just isn't something we can decide in a single conversation, Rin. It's a really important decision. Life changing. We have to both want it."

"Does that mean you don't?" Rin's voice was soft, timid, as if he was afraid of the answer.

Ryuuji sighed and wet his lips, looking anywhere but at Rin as he shrugged helplessly.

"I just… I don't know. Like I said, I haven't thought about it, not seriously, and there's a lot to consider."

"I know," Rin said as he held up his hand and started counting on his fingers, "Both surrogacy and adoption are expensive, we'd need more space, there's paternity leave and our jobs to consider-"

"You'd have to start cleaning up after yourself better," Ryuuji said. Rin turned and stuck his tongue out at him, and Ryuuji cracked a smirk, trying to lighten the mood, but it was obvious that Rin had already put a lot of thought in to this—a lot more than Ryuuji had realized. How long had he been silently thinking about this?

"Come on," Ryuuji said, punching him lightly in the shoulder, "Let's go home, put the groceries away, get dinner started and we can talk about it some more."

"'Kay," Rin said with a sigh, getting up from the swing and trudging over to where he'd left the groceries he'd been carrying. Ryuuji picked up his bags as well and they left the small park together just as the sun moved behind the horizon, giving True Cross Town and its inhabitants over to the soft cool glow of electric lighting.

"But seriously," Ryuuji said, "You're going to have to pick up after yourself more often. I don't need a second child to look after."

Rin's only response was to free up one of his arms by stacking the grocery bags, oblivious to potentially crushing their contents, and then reach over and shove Ryuuji none too gently, sending him dangerously off balance as he tripped off the curb and dropped one of the grocery bags.

Ryuuji caught his balance, sputtering incredulously, and threw his hands up in the universal sign for "what the fuck" as he looked between the groceries as they rolled to a stop in the street and Rin, who was still walking away, his back towards him.

"Real fuckin' mature, Rin!" Ryuuji called after him.

Rin didn't even so much as slow as he turned his head and stuck his tongue out at Ryuuji once more.


	11. The Difference Between

Here's another one that earned me that higher rating even though it's all spoken about in vague flower language. 9.9 Sorry it's so short.

Thanks as always for reading and all your kind comments. ^^

* * *

**The Difference Between Fucking and Making Love**

Usually it would just happen, no planning or words shared between them.

Ryuuji would kiss Rin good morning and the half demon would pull him back down and turn the kiss to something deeper, hungrier and needier, and they'd spent the early hours of the morning in bed together, loathe to be the first to let the other go, but unable to ignore the call of adult life and responsibilities.

Sometimes Rin would pinch Ryuuji's ass in passing and Ryuuji would always jump, startled and annoyed that he never seemed to see it coming and he'd shoot Rin a glare as the other boy snickered. But sometimes the glare would soften and Ryuuji would chase him down to get revenge and it would turn in to a sweaty, passionate wrestling match where both men battled for dominance. It was a battle Rin would usually lose on purpose, partly because his strength always left him on edge about hurting others, but mostly because he enjoyed bottoming more than Ryuuji did. Though he knew all of Ryuuji's weak spots when he felt like turning things around, he tried not to take advantage of that too often.

But sometimes, much less often, Ryuuji would be in a particular mood, and he'd find Rin when he was busy doing something so his attention was distracted and Ryuuji would wrap his arms around his waist, letting his chin rest on Rin's shoulder.

"So… You wanna' fuck me?"

He'd keep his voice calm and cool, trying to pretend as if it weren't a big deal or that he wasn't all that interested. Rin would turn and Ryuuji would pretend to ignore the way Rin's eyes would dance or the way that wide grin of his would light up his face as he nodded quickly and eagerly.

He used that phrase simply because he didn't know how else to say it, to declare that he was in the mood to bottom; simply saying that—"in the mood to bottom"—felt too clinical and detached, and he wasn't near enough of a dork to say something like "do sex to me"—Rin was, of course, enough of a dork to say something like that—while "have sex with me" wasn't specific enough for what Ryuuji wanted.

"Make love to me."

That was not a phrase that ever passed either of their lips, at least not seriously, and so Ryuuji would use the phrase "fuck me", but that's never what happened.

Rin would take his hand and lead Ryuuji to the bedroom where he'd slowly ease him down and undress him, like unwrapping a delicate present, peeling back one layer at a time, not just ripping all the paper off in one go. He'd touch every inch of Ryuuji's body, as if he were worshipping him, gently, as if afraid of letting his strength get out of control, afraid of hurting him, and Ryuuji would just lie back and enjoy it; just let it happen.

They both felt it—not as strong now as when they were younger and full of fluctuating teenage hormones—the unquenchable urge to have sex, to mate, to procreate, and though orgasm usually brought the same release of pleasurable endorphins either way there was something different, something special about feeling full of Rin; feeling loved and cared for. Because sometimes, when you normally did your utmost to retain an iron grip on control, it was nice to just let go like that, to let yourself be pampered once in a while instead of being the one worrying about hurting the other and making sure they felt good.

It wasn't the only time they made love—did things slow and soft and sweet—but it was one of the only times they used words to communicate what they wanted, and even though Ryuuji used the word "fuck", without fail they would always make love instead.


	12. Grey

Hmmm, what to say? I guess this is pretty much how I currently feel about aging... This chapter comes very "coincidentally timed".

Also I've already written several chapters that make reference to Ryuuji's hair, so I'm just going to assume (hope, pray) that he puts his hair back the way it was after this whole Lewin debacle!

As always thanks for reading and reviewing! :3

* * *

**Grey**

Ryuuji frowned as he leaned towards the mirror, combing his fingers through his damp freshly showered hair. It had been about six weeks and he was due to the have his roots done again, his natural dark hair peeking through the blonde.

But the roots weren't the problem. Amid the natural black was an inordinate amount of grey. That is, a whole two hairs, but that was two hairs too many, and they weren't the first. Soon there would be more, and he was almost tempted to pluck the hairs to keep their numbers down, but he knew that was counter-productive and it's not like they were going to stay visible when he was bleaching his hair anyway. Though, the one or two that popped up on the sides of his head got culled right away.

He wasn't old… Not yet. But he wasn't really sure if he could call himself young anymore either.

Rin entered the bathroom with a groggy morning greeting and stood next to Ryuuji as he started to brush his teeth. Ryuuji watched him openly in the mirror's reflection even as the haze of sleep clouded Rin's senses.

It was slightly disconcerting now that he'd noticed it. All the signs of age he knew he had to get used to in himself—the grey hairs, the wrinkle on his forehead from constant frowning, the crow's feet forming at the corners of his eyes, and simply the way his body didn't bounce back and heal like it used to—they were things that were easily ignored when one went about their daily life, but stare in the mirror long enough and you were your own worst enemy, picking out all the flaws of age that no one else was yet to notice. The thing was, now that he was staring at Rin, he noticed the other man lacked those signs of age.

They had both grown taller, and Rin had filled out somewhat, losing the last bit of baby fat from his face, but it stopped there. Or… maybe it was his imagination and he just wasn't seeing the same flaws in the person he loved as he did in himself.

"Gonna' get your hair done again soon?" Rin asked, breaking the warm comfortable silence that hung in the air with the humidity from Ryuuji's shower once he'd finished brushing his teeth and his brain had caught up with his body.

"Yeah, it's about time," Ryuuji said, running his fingers through his damp hair and pretending he hadn't just been combing for signs of aging.

"You're gonna' go bald like your old man if you keep bleaching it."

"What!"

"Yeah, you'll get a bald stripe right down the middle."

"Don't even fuckin' suggest that!"

He reached for Rin, trying to throw him in to a headlock, but the other boy ducked, stepping out of his reach with a laugh, bouncing back on his heels with a huge grin and his arms up, ready to dodge another attack.

Ryuuji grinned slyly and bent his knees. The floor was still damp with condensation, and he was only wearing a towel, but that was hardly going to stop him.

Rin chewed his lip, waiting as they stared each other down, neither wanting to make the first move until Ryuuji leapt towards him with an explosion of motion and Rin was bouncing back in to the bedroom, retreating for better footing. He tried to dodge around their bed but Ryuuji grabbed him by the hip and threw him down on to the mattress, stepping in behind him to pin him to the bed before he could try to escape. He placed his hands over Rin's, lacing their fingers together, and Rin turned his head to look up at him over his shoulder, his eyes half lidded, his mouth parted and his tongue darting out to wet his lips.

Ryuuji glanced over at the clock on the bedside table. He normally left early for work, but really, they had at least an hour before they _had_ to clock in. He pressed his lips to the back of Rin's neck and the other boy groaned, lifting his hips, his tail squirming against Ryuuji's bare chest.

Yes, they had time to play.

* * *

No matter what misgivings Ryuuji had, you were never too old for morning sex and twenty minutes later he had completely forgotten about those stray grey hairs. He lay on their bed, arms raised above his head with a deep, contented sigh, stretching out and enjoying the feeling of Rin pressed up against him, both of them enjoying the remnants of loosened muscles and an orgasm well spent before the feeling slipped away. He glanced back at the clock and sighed. Time to get back to reality.

He pushed the blankets aside and tried to roll out of bed, only for Rin to tighten the grip he had on his waist.

"Mmm, not yet," Rin said, his voice a soft purr against Ryuuji's skin.

"I gotta'," Ryuuji said softly as he pried Rin's arm off of him, slipping out from under it. "You have to as well."

Rin pouted, jutting his lip out as he watched Ryuuji dress. Unfortunately the pout went mostly ignored. They'd been together too long for it to work all the time and well… it worked better before sex, not after. And less so when it came to work. There were certain things Rin got pampered on, certain things he got away with, but Ryuuji tended to be very strict about work in general. Not just their jobs, but doing a good job at everything. He took it very seriously.

Rin rolled over on to his arms, pushing himself up and checking the time with a frown.

"It's not that late. We don't have to go yet- Oh! I have to make you breakfast," Rin said, suddenly tapping a spring of energy and hopping out of bed to throw his boxers back on.

"Don't worry about it," Ryuuji said, "I'll just grab something on the way out."

"But it's your birthday!"

Ryuuji stopped and shrugged. "So make me a big dinner or something." It was his birthday, but it was also just another day. He didn't need or want the reminder.

Rin let out a big huff of a sigh through his nose as he grit his teeth, redoubling his pouting efforts. "B-but…. Thirty! It's a milestone. We should do something special."

Ryuuji looked at Rin, narrowing his eyes. He was pushing more than usual. They tended to have little non-arguments like this all the time, but Rin would usually acquiesce after the first few failed attempts at getting his way, knowing Ryuuji was usually too stubborn to be convinced when he really put his foot down.

"What are you up to?" Ryuuji asked.

"N-nothing," Rin said a little too quickly, "God forbid I want to spend more time with you." He rolled his eyes, but didn't look back at Ryuuji, busying himself with getting dressed.

"Uh huh…" Ryuuji said, clearly unconvinced, "Well, why don't we go out for dinner then instead? Make a date of it? I'd hate for you to waste time slaving in the kitchen when you just want to spend time with me." He purred that last sentence at Rin, taunting him, watching as the other man's back tensed, his tail hanging low and swishing in agitation. Did Rin realize how much of a give-away that thing was?

"You're planning something."

"N-no," Rin said, though his voice rose slightly in pitch and his tail stopped moving, going rigid as if held still through deliberate will, "What could I possibly be planning? A-Aside from trying to make you breakfast, which I outright said I wanted to do."

But as he spoke he was still looking anywhere but directly at Ryuuji, avoiding his eyes even as he tried to reason through his innocence.

Ryuuji stepped close, putting his hand on the other boy's shoulder, and Rin tensed slightly as Ryuuji leaned over him, close enough that Rin could feel the warmth of his body.

"Good, because you know I hate surprises."

Rin shivered, swallowing the lump in his throat and nodding curtly.

"Now… I'm leaving in fifteen minutes whether you make me breakfast or not."

It was a little bit heart-warming how much Rin liked to feed him, because the other boy was suddenly tripping over his pants as he rushed to put them on, sticking his tongue out at Ryuuji as he pushed past him on his way to leave the bed room.

Ryuuji chuckled and glanced at the clock again. Twenty minutes. He could leave in twenty minutes and still get to work early.

* * *

The front door closed with a loud clack and barely a full second had passed before Rin let out a breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. He picked up his phone, dialing Shima's cell and speaking the second the line picked up.

"He's on his way!"

"Okumura-kun?" Shima's confused voice came through with a slight pop of static.

"He's on his way. I couldn't stall him any longer."

"Ah, it's cool. I already finished."

"Okay, cool. He kinda' realized something was up near the end, so I couldn't push any harder without totally giving it away."

"Whatever. Even if he suspects, it's too late. It's been done." A mirthless laugh came through the speaker, and Rin chuckled.

"Thanks again for the assist, Okumura-kun."

"No problem," Rin said, chuckling lightly. He then ended the call with Shima and seriously considered calling in sick to work so he could get started on some kind of elaborate apology dinner. Going out had sounded nice, but that was probably going to be off the table once Ryuuji got to work. Plus, if he didn't go to work, he wouldn't get to see the look on Ryuuji's face.

"Damn…" Rin said, chuckling softly in to the empty room, the curse falling from his lips without conviction. "He's gonna' kill me."

* * *

Ryuuji stood in front of his desk, fists clenching and unclenching as he struggled to stop himself from making a scene—more of a scene than had already been created.

His desk had been gift-wrapped, like a giant present, the entire thing wrapped up with bright colored paper and topped with a big red bow. On top of it sat a card that read _Happy 30__th__ you old fart_ in Shima's lazy handwriting. That bastard… They were the same age!

He'd known Shima was involved even before seeing the card. Rin hadn't had the time to do this without Ryuuji noticing, and no one else would have helped with this, but it didn't matter who the mastermind was. The only question was who was Ryuuji going to kill first.


	13. Regrets

Sorry this is late. :x

It ended up a lot longer than I anticipated and gave me some trouble, but I'm pretty happy with how it turned out in the end.

As always, thanks for reading and reviewing. X3

* * *

**Regrets**

Ryuuji stared down past his clasped hands, past the floor, his eyes focused on nothing as he waited. He'd long since passed the point of exhaustion where he could even focus on his worry—all the what if's and could be's—now simply existing in a state of ragged, fearful anticipation.

The hospital waiting room was stuffy and warm. People shifted around him, the occasional cough or sniffle breaking the silence as they all waited for a doctor or nurse to come free them from that uncomfortable hell of not knowing.

A can of cold coffee was pressed in to his hands and he looked up, noticing Rin for the first time. The half demon didn't say anything at first, simply falling in to the seat beside Ryuuji. When Ryuuji failed to move or respond in any way, Rin took the can of coffee from his limp hands and cracked it open before handing it back to him.

"Drink," Rin said, "You've been awake for over 24 hours. You look like hell."

Ryuuji raised the can to his lips, drinking from it like a robot following an order, not even tasting it, only to continue holding the can with limp fingers as he went back to staring blankly off in to the distance.

"He's gonna' be okay, you know?" Rin said, placing his hand on Ryuuji's shoulder, squeezing gently, but the statement lacked Rin's usual bullheaded certainty. Ryuuji glanced sidelong at him, his brow pinched in his usual glare, but his eyes were hopeful—pleading.

"He faced off against the Impure King by himself and survived. A heart attack is nothing."

Ryuuji finally sighed, the first real signs of life as he sat up, straightening himself and stretching in his chair, his joints popping audibly. He took another drink of the canned coffee and then rubbed his temples. "I should have been here," he said, his voice quiet, even for waiting room standards.

"You're here now," Rin offered, "That's what's important."

Ryuuji said nothing, simply shaking his head as if he didn't believe it was enough, and a quiet moment passed between them, filled with uncertainty and the quiet chatter of the waiting room around them.

"Do you ever think…" Rin trailed off, looking away from him hesitantly and scratching at the side of his face as if to cover the awkward silence with action. "Do you ever think maybe you made the wrong choice? Staying with me instead of taking over as the head of the Myodha?"

"Yes."

Ryuuji grunted as Rin punched him in the shoulder. It had been just on the edge of what you could call one of Rin's "playful" punches. Rin didn't have to say it. Ryuuji knew he had hurt his feelings by being so quick to answer the question that way. He took a deep breath, rubbing his shoulder where he knew a bruise would rapidly be forming as he exhaled softly.

"I think about it all the time. Did I abandon my life-long goals? Did I let the temple and my family down?" Ryuuji stopped, and took a deep breath as he collected his thoughts, "I think about those things, and I think about what happened to my father; the way his duty and the secrets he held almost consumed him. The way he was driven to drink and distance himself from our family, because he wasn't allowed to confide in anyone without breaking his oath; an oath he didn't have a choice in making. An oath that was foisted on him by his great-great-grandfather, or whoever it was that made the first pact. An oath I took upon myself on impulse when I was still young and naïve enough to believe I alone could help restore the Myodha to its former glory." He paused. "An oath I wouldn't have been able to fulfill if not for you."

Rin sucked in a quiet breath and Ryuuji could feel the half demon's stare boring holes in the side of his face as he listened intently. He didn't know if it was the exhaustion that spurred him on, but Ryuuji took another breath, about to continue, when a tug on his sleeve and a pointed look from Rin had him glancing up to find his mother approaching them.

"Well, if it isn't my favorite son."

Torako's voice was cheerful as she approached them with open arms, but the dark, tired circles under her eyes and her wan smile belied the fact that she'd probably gotten just as little sleep as they had. Blotchy red eyes showed she'd probably been crying, perhaps even right outside the hospital, as if she'd composed herself for their sake.

Ryuuji stood to greet his mother, feeling slightly lighter now that there was one more person to share their burden with, only to sputter indignantly as she moved first to hug Rin. But when she hugged Ryuuji she clung to him with a desperate strength not befitting her tiny frame, shaking in his arms. She took a deep breath, her head pressed to his shoulder, before stepping back and pulling a handkerchief from her pocket, dabbing her eyes.

"I've made all the necessary arrangements," she said after she'd composed herself, "The Inn will be fine without me for the next few days, so I don't have to worry about it. I can… I can take the time…" She trailed off.

"If there's anything you or Tatsuma need, we're here for you," Rin said, and Torako blinked, momentarily caught off guard by the inclusion of her husband in that offer, as if Rin wholly believed he'd pull through—as if it weren't even in question. She smiled.

"Thank you. Has there been any news?"

"Not yet. We've-"

"Suguro-san?"

They both jumped at the doctor's approach—all bundles of jittery nerves, like an elastic band held taught, waiting for the release.

"Yes?" Ryuuji and his mother said in unison, sharing a worried glance.

"Suguro Tatsuma is out of surgery. Would you come with me, please?"

The doctor turned without waiting for a response and Torako and Ryuuji shared a worried glance before she fell in step behind him, but Ryuuji held back. He'd been stuck in that exhausting state of uncertainty for so long his body had become numb. Now, if he followed the doctor, one way or the other, he'd know.

Ryuuji started as Rin took his hand, twining their fingers together, squeezing gently; a comforting stable reminder of his presence and silent support. Ryuuji took a deep breath and let Rin guide him after the doctor.

The doctor led them only as far as outside the waiting room doors, so they would be afforded some privacy away from the other families, waiting for their own release—to hear the fate of their loved ones—before he gave them the news. The good and the bad.

Tatsuma was stable for the time being, but he wasn't out of the woods yet. Infection and other complications marred the road to recovery. He was bed bound for the immediate future and would face the rest of his life weaker than before, but he was alive, and ready to take visitors.

The sound of the heart monitor echoed throughout the tiny room as they entered. The machines and wires crowded him, making Tatsuma look impossibly tiny and frail, a hard contrast to his normally robust and energetic persona.

He looked up as they entered, a weak smile lighting up his face and instantly making him look more alive as he sheepishly rubbed his head, nodding towards them in greeting.

"Sorry to worry you all."

"The hell are you apologizing for, old man?" Ryuuji said softly, the acerbic words familiar to his tongue, but holding none of their usual bite. He stepped up to the side of the bed, looking down at his father's weakened form before taking his hand and leaning down to embrace him in a hug, clapping him on the back before stepping back awkwardly, unused to showing him physical affection after the gap in their relationship had appeared, but wanting the physical touch to reassure himself that he wasn't simply dreaming, having fallen asleep in the hard plastic waiting room chair.

It was weird. Demons were one thing. Just as Rin had said, Tatsuma had faced off against some of the worst and lived to tell about it. To think that he could be brought this low because of something so simple—it was humbling. It could happen to anyone. It could happen to him too.

Torako stepped up to the side of the bed, scowling down at her husband, her face that of a disappointed mother ready to scold a child, before the stress of the whole situation overwhelmed her and her expression crumpled as she collapsed at the side of the bed, crying harder than her tiny handkerchief could handle.

"The doctors say it was probably caused by stress." Tatsuma sat up to take Torako's hand, rubbing her back as she cried.

"I'm sure the drinking doesn't help either," Torako cut in, her tone bitter, but the effect weakened as she continued to cry, her words broken up by her sobbing. Tatsuma chuckled lightly, but declined to comment.

Torako continued to scold him between sobs, chastising him for the poor choices that may or may not have contributed to this outcome, but Tatsuma just laughed it off, letting her cling to his hand. Ryuuji said nothing, merely taking in his parents' presence, knowing that everything Tatsuma had done had been done out of love. You couldn't change the past, but Ryuuji knew that given the opportunity and knowing where it would get him, his father would have done it all the same, taking that impossible burden upon himself without hesitation in order to protect his family.

After a while Rin and Ryuuji retreated from the room so his parents could be alone and his father could rest, the surgery and medication having taken its toll on the man.

"It looks like he'll be okay," Rin said in the hallway outside the room, his tone hopeful.

"Yeah… Looks like."

Ryuuji rubbed his temples, letting his head fall back against the wall behind him with a sigh. Rin sidled up next him, slipping an arm around his waist without a word, letting his head fall against Ryuuji's shoulder. After a minute Ryuuji's head slid down to rest against Rin's, and Rin nearly jump when Ryuuji started snoring right in his ear.

"Oi," Rin said, shrugging his shoulder to lightly jostle Ryuuji awake. "If you're gonna' sleep then let's get you back to your parent's place."

"Wasn't sleeping… I'm fine."

"Like hell you are. You've been awake for hours, and now that you know your dad is okay your body is crashing. We're getting you out of here and in to a bed. End of discussion."

Surprisingly Ryuuji nodded, rubbing his face as he started to move instead of arguing.

"Ya' know…" Ryuuji started softly, his words muffled by a severe lack of sleep, "All that shit that happened with me and my dad back then, back when we were just exwires? I was so pissed at him, thinking he was abandoning our family and our goals, only to realize he'd been protecting us all along and just couldn't tell us."

Rin nodded as he fell in step beside him.

"After everything that happened, I thought for sure he'd finally join The Order and help restore our temple… But he didn't, and I had no idea how to take it. Even though we parted on good terms, I didn't talk to him again for over a year."

Rin reached up and lightly cuffed Ryuuji on the back of the head.

"Ow! The hell was that for?!" Ryuuji asked, suddenly much more awake as he rubbed the back of his head. Add that to the list of bruises

"After everything I did to make sure you guys weren't fighting, you didn't talk to him for over a year?!"

"Would ya' just let me finish the damn story?" Ryuuji snapped, "It's not like I was actively avoiding talking to him either. It just wasn't convenient while I was going to school, but… My point was… I thought things would go back to the way they were when I was a kid and they didn't, and at first I didn't know how to take it, but… I realized I was being selfish. He's been so much happier, my mom too, just taking care of the inn and staying close to family."

"Yeah, he has, hasn't he?" Rin said quietly.

"Anyways, I just wanted to finish what I was saying earlier. Sometimes I do second guess the choices we've made, but every time I come to the same conclusion."

Ryuuji took Rin's hand and turned to face him, stepping in close and letting their foreheads touch.

"You don't have to say it…"

"Maybe, but I want to. Family is important, and for me that includes you. The choices I made, that led me here? With you? I wouldn't do anything different, except, maybe…" he trailed off, looking down at the floor between them. Rin narrowed his eyes and ducked slightly so Ryuuji would be forced to look at him, biting his lip in concern.

"Except what?"

"Except… I think I wouldn't wait so long before agreeing to let our family get bigger."

Rin stepped back and Ryuuji could practically see the wheels turning inside his head as the meaning dawned on him and Rin's eyes widened, his mouth dropping open, before stretching in to a wide smile as he began to bristle with newfound energy.

"Oh! Oh my- Are you serious?"

"I wouldn't joke about something like this, idiot."

"Oh my god," Rin said, hopping from foot to foot as he fished his phone out of his pocket. "I have to tell Shiemi!"

"Shiemi? Why?" Ryuuji asked, confused by the sudden turn of events, but Rin was already dialing, practically fumbling the numbers in his excitement before cradling the phone to his ear.

"Because she agreed to be our surrogate," he said quickly, before the line picked up and he turned away from Ryuuji to happily relay the news.

Ryuuji sighed, shaking his head. He could hardly believe that Rin had talked to Shiemi about something so personal when as far as he was concerned they were only considering things—Of course the two of them would talk, but to have her offer something like that?

They had talked about kids a few times since the first discussion, but it mostly just led to Ryuuji stressing over how expensive or difficult it would be. However, he'd come to realize that those concerns weren't as big as he thought. Family was important, and it wasn't like he didn't want kids. It sounded appealing when Rin talked about all the positives, but Ryuuji often felt like the job of considering the negatives fell to him alone. Sometimes that led to focusing on the negatives and not being able to see anything else, but thinking about his own relationship with his father had helped him realize that a lot of the negatives weren't that big of a deal.

It shocked him how easily his father had thrown aside his career as an exorcist, but he couldn't deny that it had been the right choice for him.

Despite all his misgivings, they could make things work, and doubt didn't mean they shouldn't try, right?

Ryuuji could hear Shiemi squeal through the phone, excitedly congratulating Rin before he hung up and turned back to Ryuuji only to squeeze him in a tight hug.

"Thank you."

"The hell are ya' thanking me for?" Ryuuji asked even as he returned the hug. "I'm not doing this just for you."

"I know, but still… Thank you."

Rin smiled up at him and Ryuuji couldn't help but smile back. Rin's infectious excitement almost overwrote the exhaustion he felt seeping out of his bones—almost.

"You're welcome," he kissed the top of Rin's head and then released him, taking his hand. "Let's get out of here, get some sleep, and then you can fill me in on exactly what it is you roped Shiemi in to."

Rin could only laugh, suppressing a smile as they left the hospital together.


	14. Hovering

This one's a bit short, but I hope you enjoy it anyways.

Thanks as always for reading and commenting. :3

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**Hovering**

The damp cool soil soothed Shiemi's knees as she knelt, transplanting flowers and herbs in the garden outside her family shop. The sun was bright, and a million tiny rainbows shone, reflected in the dew drops that clung to the leaves and flowers that surrounded her. A bead of sweat trickled down her brow and she wiped it away, smudging dirt across her face. Rin tried to wipe it away with a damp cloth, but Shiemi waved him away.

"But-"

"It's just dirt, Rin."

He stepped back, but continued to hover over her. She tried to ignore him as she kept working.

"Do your knees hurt? I could get you some knee pads." He sounded eager, like a child trying to help a parent; trying to make himself useful.

Shiemi sighed, but kept her voice calm. "I'm fine. I like to feel the soil."

Rin was quiet for a while, but was at her side instantly, helping her stand as she hobbled to her feet, clutching her rounded stomach. She didn't need his help to walk, but she let him guide her to the wrought iron table sitting by the garden path. A pitcher of lemonade and a couple of glasses sat there, cool drops of condensation sticking to the glass and puddling on the table. Before she could reach for it Rin poured her a glass.

Shiemi pursed her lips, and then thanked him as he handed it to her. She took a sip and sighed in satisfaction. It was the perfect combination of sweet and tart, and it was ice cold. Somehow, it was just the perfect drink for quenching one's thirst on a hot summer day, and one of the benefits of having Rin practically living with her. One of the only benefits. Both him and Ryuuji, if they weren't at work, they were at her family's shop, cooking, cleaning, and just generally trying to micromanage everything she did to make sure it was safe and healthy, and it was beginning to drive her up the wall.

"Refill?" Rin asked.

"The glass isn't even half empty, Rin."

"I could top you up." He smiled innocently, holding out the pitcher.

Shiemi sighed and pushed the glass towards him, then tried to hobble back to her fresh patch of dirt while he was distracted, but he was once again at her side instantly, helping her walk and kneel in the earth as she carried the tiny load on her stomach.

She couldn't really blame him. Either of them. She knew Rin was protective, she just never realized how excessive or annoying it could be. The funny thing was, it wasn't even technically his baby. Medical science had advanced far enough that it could have been both his and Ryuuji's child, but they didn't make nearly enough for the procedure on Exorcist salaries, and they had all quietly agreed that Rin's genetics should die with him. It was an uncomfortable topic that none of them wanted to deal with, and so genetically speaking, the baby was hers and Ryuuji's. They had agreed though, that she'd just be "Aunty Shiemi" until the child was old enough to know the truth, though she was more than happy to stick around as long as they needed, but she didn't want to take any of the experience away from Rin. It felt weird to say, but he'd make a great mother, if one of them_ had_ to fill the role.

"Rin," she said slowly, keeping her hands in the cool soil and not looking up at him as he hovered over her.

"Yeah?"

"You know it's okay for kids to get dirty, right?"

"Yeah, of course."

"And it's okay for them to scrape their knees sometimes."

"But-"

"Because if you don't let them scrape their knees sometimes, they'll be afraid to run. Do you get what I'm saying?"

"Yeah…" he said, his shoulders sagging, "Yeah, I get it."

"Go sit down. I'll ask for help if I need it."

"Okay…" he said softly as he slunk back to the little table with his tail between his legs, sitting down to watch her from a distance so he wouldn't bother her so much. He sighed.

"And Rin?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for the lemonade."

"You're welcome!" he said, smiling broadly, his mood instantly restored with the thought that he had done something to help her after all.

This time when sweat began to drip down her brow she was free to wipe it away, smudging all the dirt she wanted across her skin, messing up her hair, and feeling thoroughly worked and worthwhile as she pruned and weeded and watered. In a way she understood how he felt. Taking care of her garden was one of her great joys in life; being able to cultivate something and watching it grow. It's true, she could have left nature to water the garden, relying on the heavens for rain, but then there was the risk of not enough or even too much water. It was only after years of study and working at her grandmother's side that she'd learned all plants are different and need different things. Rin would figure it out too.

And for a while he simply sat back and watched her, enjoying the sun, and letting her enjoy her work. She'd lost track of time when Ryuuji entered the garden, his arms laden with white grocery bags straining under their own weight, only to stop when he saw the two of them.

"What are you doing?" Ryuuji snapped, and both of them looked up at him in confusion.

"It's hot out, and you're just sitting on your ass while Shiemi is working? Get her a drink or something."

Shiemi didn't even hesitate as Rin tried to stammer an apology or explanation. Instead she pushed herself up from the ground, lurching to her feet and marching towards Ryuuji, wrenching two of the grocery bags from his hands.

"I'm fine! The baby is fine! EVERYONE IS FINE!" she shouted before turning and marching inside the house while Ryuuji stared after her, dumbfounded.

After a moment of stunned silence Rin appeared at his side to help with the rest of the groceries.

"Should I ask what that was about?" Ryuuji asked, still staring after Shiemi even though she was long gone.

"Go ahead," Rin said with a smirk, "It'll be your funeral."


	15. What's In A Name?

Ain't got much to say, except thanks for reading and reviewing. I know some authors always respond to each individual comment, but I feel weird doing that, yet I want you to know I appreciate every single comment all the same.

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**What's In A Name?**

Stacks of half-filled cardboard boxes surrounded Ryuuji as he sat at their tiny kitchen table, perusing the newspaper with a red pen in hand. He tapped it against his chin, reading thoughtfully, then circled another posting under the Rentals and Real Estate category. Even though Shiemi's house was open to them Ryuuji was determined to find a suitable place before the end of the month when their lease expired.

Their current apartment was small, but it had served their needs for years. It's not like they had a lot of stuff or needed the space—Rin's biggest concern was always the kitchen anyway. Now, their current room was too small to comfortably allocate space for a crib, let alone all the other supplies they'd need, and they'd have to get an extra bedroom eventually anyways, might as well do it now before they had to worry about moving and setting up for the baby. There was just so much that had to be taken care of in such a short period of time.

Ryuuji had tried to delegate, but the half packed boxes stacked around him were the signs of Rin's success, or rather, his procrastination.

Where was he anyway?

Ryuuji left the kitchen, leaving behind the newspaper, and found Rin in the bedroom. He was sitting on the edge of their bed, a single book in hand and surrounded by more half packed boxes.

Rin looked up as he entered, blushing, embarrassed to be caught slacking, but smiled weakly as he looked back down at the book. It was a book of baby names.

"Found anything you like yet?" Ryuuji asked.

This was another area where Rin was slacking, though perhaps slacking wasn't the most apt description. He simply hadn't picked any names he liked yet, though he'd certainly been looking. Ryuuji on the other hand already had a top ten list of both boy's and girl's names prepared.

"No," Rin said with a pout, "But… Well, I was thinking…"

Ryuuji waited. Rin's occasional hesitancy had annoyed Ryuuji when he was younger, but he was completely used to this little song and dance now. Rin normally spoke his mind without hesitation, as if he completely lacked that filter between brain and mouth, but when he did hesitate it was clear he'd already been thinking hard about it.

"I was thinking… If it's a boy, we could name him Shiro?"

Ryuuji nodded thoughtfully. He wasn't at all surprised by the suggestion. In fact he was more surprised that Rin hadn't suggested it sooner. Given how upset he'd been about giving up his last name—a name Shiro had given him—this was the perfect opportunity to honor the man, and Ryuuji had no complaints.

"Okay, and if it's a girl?"

Rin bit his lip, clutching the book in white knuckled hands. "Yuri?"

There it was, the cause of his hesitation, and if Rin's attitude was any indication he knew exactly what was wrong with that name.

"I have no problems with 'Shiro'," Ryuuji said with a sigh, sitting on the edge of the mattress next to Rin, "By all account he was a good, honorable man, but more importantly, the Vatican, who is still watching you, will probably have no problems with the name either. He was the Paladin after all. But… They might have a problem with you naming your daughter after a woman who defied their order and inadvertently caused the Blue Night." Ryuuji left out the fact that she had given birth to Rin. In his mind that was a point in her favor, but the Vatican did not agree. They still didn't, even after all these years—more than ten years of loyal service.

"I know," Rin said, gazing down at the book, "But I don't really know anything about her, except that she wanted to keep me in spite of what I am, and well, what the hell is the Vatican gonna' do about it anyway?" He glared fiercely up at Ryuuji, as if daring him to protest, before the realization of what he'd said dawned on him. He snapped his mouth shut, his eyes falling to his lap and only darting up to Ryuuji briefly before he added, "Ah… Don't answer that."

At times Rin seemed optimistically naïve, but more often than not it was forced optimism, faked for the sake of his own mental well-being and that of the people around him. He was smart enough to recognize that even though execution hadn't been on the table for years, it didn't mean he was in the clear, or that the True Cross order couldn't screw him over in other ways.

Even now, Rin's rank as a Middle Second Class exorcist was still a sore topic, and as much as Ryuuji thought Rin could still easily make Dragoon—if he put in the practice, which Ryuuji was more than happy to help him with—he tried not to bring it up anymore. He was beginning to think that Rin would be a lot happier—healthier even—if he put some distance between himself and the Vatican. He'd brought that up once before, but Rin had shrugged it off too. _What would I even do with myself?_

Starting a family would be good for Rin, give him something else to focus on, but even now, without trying, without knowing about it, the True Cross Order was finding other ways to screw with their personal lives.

Ryuuji coughed, pretending to clear his throat while trying to break the awkward silence before it formed. He didn't want to have to tell Rin the name was a bad idea, but it was, and judging by the way Rin sat—his shoulders slumped, his head bowed—he already knew. Ryuuji just wished he had a solution—that he could just make the problem go away—but that's not how life worked.

"We'll figure it out later," he said as he took the book from Rin's slack hands, "We still have a little time before we have to decide."

Rin shrugged, a non-committal half agreement, or a lack of disagreement depending on how you looked at it, so Ryuuji kissed the top of Rin's head and then placed the book back inside one of the cardboard boxes along with a stack of other books being packed away for the move, but then he paused. He moved a book aside and then reached in to pull out his old Japanese-English Dictionary. He'd kept it after high school because the occasional bit of paperwork came across his desk with English on it, but he couldn't remember the last time he'd used it. He thumbed the pages thoughtfully.

"It's a flower, isn't it?"

"Huh?" Rin looked up at him, confused.

"Your mother's name, Yuri? It's a flower."

Rin scratched his head. "I think it's European or something…?"

"I know that, but in Japanese it's also the name of a flower," Ryuuji said, flipping through the dictionary.

"Okay, I guess so," Rin said slowly, clearly not following Ryuuji's thought process.

"Here," Ryuuji said as he held the dictionary open, pointing to an entry on the page.

Rin grimaced. "You know I hate reading English."

"It says 'Lily'," Ryuuji said, rolling his eyes, "It's a flower and… I just figured flowers make good girl's names, and I don't think it's obvious enough that anyone will make the connection, but if they do we can always-" He stopped, running his hand through his hair as he looked away from Rin, feeling self-conscious. He'd gotten excited at the prospect of a solution and he'd started to ramble, but it wasn't about the meaning of the word itself. It was about the meaning behind choosing the name. "Well, I know it's not the same, but I just figured, maybe-"

He was cut off, stunned in to silence and almost knocked off balance as Rin threw his arms around his shoulders in a hug.

Rin pulled back, only to kiss Ryuuji, preventing him from saying another word before detaching himself from him. "It's perfect," he said, grabbing Ryuuji's hands and holding them tight, his eyes dancing as he imagined their possible impending future.

"I don't know about perfect," Ryuuji said, ducking his head to hide the smile that was blossoming on his face as his heart swelled. Rin's mood had instantly lightened, and it was always a little bit contagious.

"I almost want a girl now so her name can be like a big secret 'fuck you' to the Order," Rin said nonchalantly as he released Ryuuji's hands and spun on his heel, a huge grin on his face as he returned to the job of packing up their bedroom.

Ryuuji grimaced and opened his mouth to speak, but stopped. Rin was practically humming as he worked, now efficiently packing their bedroom away in to labelled boxes. One problem solved, another one potentially created? But… Ryuuji wasn't going to burst Rin's bubble now. He'd just have to figure out a fix if the problem ever came up. Besides, Lily was a nice enough name that he might have to re-organize his own top ten list, so instead of saying anything he just shook his head, letting out a sound that was half way between a chuckle and sigh as he went back to the newspaper to continue looking for a new place to live. He'd deal with that problem when it came up. _If_ it came up.

He'd just have to make sure Rin didn't share that little secret with too many people.


	16. Just Breathe

Sorry this chapter was so delayed. My work hours have doubled as we've moved in to the Christmas season, so I've had less time to write, but also, something about this chapter gave me a lot of trouble and I was completely unmotivated to work on it with what little spare time I did have.  
Mostly, I wrote this chapter because it seems like an incredibly important moment in their lives, but there isn't really any conflict and I don't like writing was feels like pointless fluff. I definitely didn't want to add pregnancy complications just for the sake of creating conflict, because I know that's an incredibly delicate subject for some people, so instead it's mostly just Ryuuji being a worrywart again while Rin flips his shit.

Also, my work schedule is going to continue to be busy through December, and I'm going to be busier in my private life as well, so I'm officially postponing updates until the new year. You know... Instead of just not posting with no warning... Hope you all have Happy Holidays.

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**Just Breathe**

Ryuuji took a deep breath and tried to ignore Rin, who seemed dead set on wearing a path in to the floor. His head was down and his hands were clasped behind his back as he anxiously circled the open space in front of the maternity ward's waiting room. Ryuuji grit his teeth, his eyes tracking Rin as he moved across the room, one side to the other and back again. He glanced up at the clock. They'd been there for hours and were uncomfortable, tired, and anxious, having come off the high of an adrenaline rush spurred by Shiemi's water breaking, only to be left waiting with no end in sight.

Rin crossed the room again. And again.

Unable to hold back any longer, Ryuuji grabbed Rin's arm as he walked by, abruptly halting his incessant pacing. "Could you sit down?" Ryuuji hissed, trying to keep quiet.

"No," Rin said, shaking off Ryuuji's grip. "I can't. I- How are you even sitting? I'm way too nervous."

"You're making _me_ nervous," Ryuuji said, grabbing hold of Rin's arm again and forcing him down in to the neighbouring seat. "And I can see your tail twitching under your shirt," he added in a hushed voice. "You're gonna' start to freak people out."

The maternity waiting room wasn't full, but there were a few other people—friends, family and other expectant husbands, all doing their best to wait patiently—but when Rin glanced around some of them looked away, clearly trying to hide the fact that they'd been staring.

Rin hunched down in to his chair, practically shaking in an effort to stay still, and gave a quiet, frustrated growl.

"Aagh, I can't help it! All this waiting. I feel so useless."

Ryuuji snorted. It was much the same way he'd felt when his father was in the hospital, of course this time was completely different. It was funny that Rin had seemed so calm then, when Ryuuji's father had potentially been a hair's breadth away from death. Of course, Rin had already lost his own father. Perhaps he'd known that the most important thing he could do for Ryuuji was simply be there for him. Now they were both in completely unfamiliar territory and Ryuuji found their roles reversed as Rin acted like he expected the worst to happen.

"All we can do is trust the doctors. Besides, the pregnancy has been completely normal up 'till now—no complications or unusual risks. It'll be fine," he said, waving his hand dismissively. He tapped his foot impatiently, the only outward appearance of his agitation, and silently hoped everything _would_ be fine. There was always a risk. Something _could_ happen, but Rin didn't need to hear that now.

Rin groaned in agitation, clenching his fists and biting his lip in a futile effort to restrain the sound.

"I know," he said, "I just... I just can't sit around and do nothing!"

Ryuuji placed his hand on Rin's shoulder, squeezing gently and trying to ease some of the tension out of the rigid muscle. "You just gotta' breathe. That's all we can do right now.

He started taking deep even breaths to illustrate his point and after a moment of skepticism Rin instinctively began to emulate him, closing his eyes as he breathed, trying to let the tension melt away.

"Hey?" Rin's eyes snapped open only to narrow in a sharp glare. "Isn't this the breathing technique they teach you in those pregnancy classes?"

"I- what? Maybe. I don't know," Ryuuji stuttered, his face darkening as his annoyance returned, "Deep breathing is a standard meditation technique."

"I ain't a woman!"

"I know that!"

Ryuuji's eye twitched as Rin continued to gripe at him, but he couldn't stop a small smirk from blossoming on his face when he realized that Rin had, at least for the time being, completely forgotten why he was so tense in the first place.

"What the hell are you laughing about?"

"Nothing!" The smile grew and Rin's displeasure intensified as Ryuuji tried to restrain his laughter.

They'd been distracted enough that they hadn't noticed the nurse's approach and they now looked up at her as she stood before them, their eyes openly asking the question they were afraid to give voice to. She smiled and nodded.

* * *

Shiemi had looked worse, but not by much. They'd all had their fair share of tough fights and dangerous life threatening injuries and Shiemi looked as if she'd just come from one such fight. She was pale and shaky, her hair and hospital gown plastered to her skin with sweat, and she was breathing as if she'd just run a marathon. The tangy, acrid scent of blood and something else they didn't want to question mingled thick in the air with the scent of hospital disinfectants and hit them like a wall as they entered the room.

Hospital staff was still bustling about as they helped clean up and get Shiemi settled in to the room where she'd be staying for the next few days while they made sure both her, and the baby, were healthy. A nurse stood at Shiemi's side, patting her down with a damp cloth and whispering quiet reassurances that everything was okay and that she'd done a good job. Shiemi nodded weakly, but clung to a small bundled lump of blankets resting against her stomach like both their lives depended on it.

Rin took a hesitant step forward and when Shiemi smiled at him he was at her side in an instant. She laughed weakly and nodded down at the bundle of fabric nestled against her chest.

The bundle moved, squirming weakly, and Rin's vision blurred with tears. He hadn't even seen it yet, his child, and he was already crying. They were fine. Shiemi was fine, the baby was fine. Everybody was fine, and relief washed over Rin like a tsunami, scrubbing away the mountain of stress he hadn't fully realized he'd been harboring as the flood gates opened and tears streamed down his cheeks. Ryuuji squeezed his shoulder, standing quietly by his side. He might have been worried by the site of the tears, if not for the huge smile that split Rin's face.

"Say 'Hello' to your daughter," Shiemi said softly, pulling back the blankets so they could see the tiny squashed face resting against her chest. The newborn girl peered up at them through squinting eyes as they crowded around her. Rin sniffled quietly and wiped his eyes, his shoulders shaking. He couldn't stop the tears from falling, too overwhelmed to do much of anything, and Shiemi laughed quietly.

"Do you want to hold her?"

"O-of course!"

With some help from a nurse Shiemi sat up, and together they got the little girl in to Rin's arms where he cradled her carefully, hiccupping quietly as he tried not to cry on her. She fidgeted weakly in Rin's arms, reaching out with her tiny hands and turning to face him. Rin's lip trembled and he started to wheeze, unable to form words around the tears and Ryuuji stepped in close, ready to take their daughter from Rin if he had to.

"Remember what I said earlier. Just breathe."

Rin nodded emphatically and started taking deep shaky breaths as he tried to calm himself. He continued to sob, but after a moment his breathing returned to some semblance of normalcy. He looked up at Ryuuji, unable to suppress his smile even as he tried to keep his breathing normal.

"S-she's j-just so beautiful."

Ryuuji returned Rin's smile with a snort and a lopsided smirk. He thought 'beautiful' might have been a bit of an overstatement. Freshly born, her face was red, wrinkled, and blotchy, and her tiny misshapen skull sported patchy peach fuzz hair, but physical appearances didn't matter. To Ryuuji there was nothing more beautiful than the site of his husband, smiling brightly while openly sobbing as he held their new baby girl.

Lily. Their daughter.

He might not have been anywhere near as overwhelmed as Rin, but Ryuuji's heart did little flips in his chest and he couldn't suppress his own smile as Rin continued to laugh and cry at the same time. He stepped in close, wrapping his arms loosely around Rin while leaving space for Lily, who, despite all odds had remained silent during the whole exciting exchange even though everything should have been a new and terrifying experience for her. Instead she kept her head turned towards Rin, as if listening for the sound of his voice.

As a newborn her sight wasn't yet good enough to make out more than lights and shapes, but her hearing should have been stronger and Rin had done a lot of sickeningly embarrassing things like talking to Shiemi's stomach. Ryuuji hadn't quite felt comfortable doing the same. Shiemi and him were close, but not like she was with Rin. He wondered… Did Lily already recognize Rin's voice?

With an odd sense of ironic timing Lily started to cry and Ryuuji and Rin instantly fell apart, wondering if they'd done something to hurt her, somehow screwing up parenthood barely five minutes in to it, when another nurse entered the room.

"I'm right on time by the sounds of it," she said, "She's probably hungry and I'm here to teach you how to breastfeed."

That last sentence had been directed at Shiemi and it only took a moment for Rin and Ryuuji to turn red as they realized what she had said. Rin passed Lily back to Shiemi, but was loathe to fully leave their side, brushing the back of his hand against Lily's cheek, even as she continued to cry.

"You doing okay?" Ryuuji asked, and Shiemi nodded, giving him one of her little determined smiles.

"I'm tired and sore, but mostly… I'm really hungry too."

Ryuuji chuckled, running his hand through his hair. He was tired from just sitting and waiting hours on end. He could only imagine how she felt.

"How about when we come back we bring you something from the cafeteria?"

"Sounds perfect."

Rin was still sniffling, wiping his eyes and nose on his sleeve as Ryuuji led him from the room.

"I didn't realize you were such a crybaby."

"I-I'm not! I just-"

"I know," Ryuuji said as he ruffled Rin's hair, "I'm just giving you a hard time. What'ya say we get something to eat first. Give Shiemi some time with Lily and the nurse before returning."

"Ugh, cafeteria food?"

"Yeah, I know…"

Ryuuji reached to pat Rin's hair again, but the other man ducked the attempt and darted out of reach, spinning to stick his tongue out before turning back around and heading for the elevator.

Ryuuji let out a quiet chuff of a laugh as he followed.

Tears had been fairly high up on the list of expected reactions, alongside exuberant swearing, fist pumping and hysterical giddy laughter. Given how excited Rin had been for the entire pregnancy, Ryuuji hadn't expected anything less than for Rin to be completely overwhelmed. What he hadn't been sure of, was his own list of possible reactions. Sure, he was happy of course. There was even a small amount of giddiness—which he felt the instinctive urge to suppress, to remain in control of himself and his emotions—but he wasn't sure how much of it was genuine and how much of it was being excited _for_ Rin. It wasn't like he wasn't excited, but perhaps that simply didn't compare to how nervous he felt. Nervous about what the future would bring and whether or not he'd be a good father—Rin would be a great father, of course, there was no questioning that—but for Ryuuji, only time would tell.


	17. As It Should Be

Sorry for the heinous delay. When I said needed to take a short break due to work being busy during the holiday season, I had every intention of resuming posting in January... Sigh~

I've been having trouble with motivation and flitting between different projects, which is no good when I like to have a nice backlog of stuff so I can make sure I maintain a consistent publishing schedule, yet I've found I'm most motivated when I have concrete deadlines, because I don't like letting you guys down. (Haha... ha... sobs)

So, going forward I'm going to be publishing "something" weekly, which means not necessarily chapters of Domesticia, which further means if you only follow my content on this site you might not see it, since I never post explicit adult content here. If you want to see that kind of stuff you can always subscribe to me on AO3 or tumblr. I'm KorrinBelle on both sites.

Anyways, once again, sorry for the delay, and thank you for your patience. _:(´□`」 ∠):_

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**As It Should Be**

Ryuuji patted down his pockets, making sure he had his phone, keys, and wallet, then picked up the stack of papers in his In Box and tapped it on his desk, perfectly lining up the edges before placing it in his briefcase. He then looked up at the nearby clock and sighed. It was five o'clock, so he could leave now, but would anyone hold it against him if he just put his head down on his desk and took a little nap?

Well… Rin probably would.

Everyone knew he was a new father so it was only natural that he should want to hurry home, but it was Rin who wanted him to give up the overtime, even going as far as to forsake his normal "no work at home" rule if it meant having Ryuuji home more often. It wasn't like he didn't want to go home. He was just tired. Bone tired. It had been one month—just one month—since Lily had come home from the hospital and neither of them had gotten a good night sleep since. Saying they were having trouble adjusting would be an understatement.

Shiemi came by during the day to drop off milk and help Rin while she was still on leave, but in the evenings, when Ryuuji came home from work, it was like stepping in to a different world—one he didn't feel ready to deal with and which was completely at odds with the fact that he still went to work every day as if nothing had changed.

Except a lot had changed.

Rin was no longer around to share lunch with, breaking up the drudgery of the day with his smile. In fact none of the people he normally spent his free time with were around. Shiemi was still on leave, Koneko had transferred in to the R&amp;D department, and Shima? Well, his espionage work had him disappear for months at a time. Ryuuji tried to think of the last time he'd seen the other man and came up blank.

There was always Izumo, but she'd probably complain about the imposition and then tell him to suck it up and get over it.

Work wasn't the only thing different either. He went home to a different apartment—a bigger apartment in a more family friendly area, but not the apartment he and Rin had built their life in. It was just… another thing he had to get used to.

It wasn't like Rin was magically having an easier time of it either. The first time Rin missed cooking dinner because he was too tired and too busy Ryuuji got his head damn near bit off for even questioning it. The next day he called Rin to see if he wanted him to pick something up and got chewed out for waking Lily.

Exhaustion had them both on their last nerve, but the worst part was that Ryuuji felt like an outsider. He couldn't complain about Rin's mood, because he was tired too, and it wasn't like he hadn't expected a child to be a lot of work. But sometimes, when he came home, and Rin wasn't in a bad mood, he'd be the polar opposite—excited to tell Ryuuji about how Lily smiled at him or held his finger. But when Ryuuji was home Lily just cried. Sometimes she slept and ate, but mostly she just cried.

He glanced up at the clock again. Ten after. He snapped his briefcase shut with a sigh. He couldn't put it off any longer before Rin might question it, and he didn't want to lie or make up an excuse.

He left the office, picking up Chinese take-out on his way home—better safe than sorry, right?—and made his way towards their new apartment. He missed the old place—small as it had been, it had been home.

He made it all the way through the building and was standing in front of their door before he realized how quiet it was. Lily's cries had greeted him upon his arrival home every day to the point that he'd almost gotten used to it.

Too quiet.

His heart leapt in to his throat as he fumbled his key in the lock, his already tumultuous thoughts turning towards all the causes of such a damning silence and stumbled in to the entryway as he finally got the door open. He started to shout—Rin's name on the tip of his tongue—but caught himself at the last second.

Rin was sitting on the couch, his head lolling over the back as he snored. Lily was sound asleep, secure in his arms.

Ryuuji took a soft silent breath as he stilled his racing heart, and then made his way to the kitchen, leaving the take-out on the counter. He was hungry, but it could wait. He wasn't about to wake either of them, not when joining them seemed like the much better option.

He returned to the living room with the intention of putting Lily down in her crib, but found her awake, her tiny eyes following him as he entered the room. He hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to do, when she started to fuss, squirming in Rin's arms. He crossed the room quickly, gently scooping Lily up and hoping he could quiet her before she woke Rin.

Cradling her in his arms, he supported her head the way Rin and Shiemi had shown him, yet was somehow certain he was doing it wrong. She seemed so tiny and fragile as he rocked her, trying to calm her, and he had to wonder if Rin felt like this all the time; as if he could crush the life out of something by simply moving the wrong way.

She continued to fuss, starting to cry, and he was even more convinced he was doing something wrong. Ryuuji looked helplessly to Rin despite the fact that he was still sound asleep on the couch, but then thought better about waking him. Rin could be "grumpy" when woken up at the best of times. Disturbing him now when he was hopelessly exhausted was asking for trouble, but if he didn't do something soon Lily's crying would wake him anyways.

He held her up and gave a tentative sniff—she didn't smell like she needed a change—then he noticed the bottle lying on the couch beside Rin's limp hand; a small spot of milk staining the couch where milk leaked from the tip.

Of course. Rin must have been trying to feed her when they both dozed off. Her tiny stomach meant many tiny feedings. It was the primary reason they were all lacking in sleep.

He grabbed the bottle and took Lily in to the kitchen, trying to give Rin more time to sleep.

Now how did you do this? He'd only done it once, very briefly at the hospital when the nurse had come in to teach them. Did he need to get a new bottle? This one should have been good for a few hours after coming out of the fridge, and Lily and Rin couldn't have been asleep that long, so maybe it was fine? Probably?

He erred on the side of caution, setting the used bottle aside and pulling a fresh one from the fridge. Did he need to warm it up? That was more… natural, right?

He started running the bottle under hot water in the sink as Lily's fussing changed from discontented gurgling to actual crying. She fidgeted, squirming in his arms as he struggled to support her one handed while warming the bottle with the other before giving up on that and sitting down at the kitchen table.

He rubbed the bottle against her lips, trying to entice her to drink, but she turned away from it, crying harder and kicking feebly against his chest. Ryuuji pursed his lips as he tried not to let his frustration deter him. Crying was supposed to mean she wanted something, right? How many things could a baby possibly want, and how did Rin make this look so easy? Was this why Rin always rushed to care for Lily when she cried? Because he didn't think Ryuuji could do it?

The downward spiral of his thoughts halted as Lily took the bottle in her mouth, closing her eyes and balling her tiny hands in to fists as she instantly quieted.

Oh…

_Oh._

A tight, warm feeling tugged at Ryuuji's chest, not unlike the way he'd felt the first time he'd told Rin he liked him—the fear and anticipation, and the exultation when Rin had smiled and said he liked him back, in spite of their disastrous first date. It was a feeling which told you that despite the fear and the uncertainty, despite all the miss-steps along the way, everything was as it should be and would be alright; that the risk had been worth it.

That warm feeling in his chest swelled, blossoming like a flower as she opened bright, inquisitive eyes and looked up at him as she continued to drink, waving her tiny hands and trying to grasp the bottle, but not yet understanding how to use her own hands. She released it from her mouth, coming up for air with a tiny little gasp and smiling up at him before going back for seconds.

A muffled curse came from the living room, followed by Rin's panicked voice as he called out for Lily.

"In here," Ryuuji said, and Rin darted in to the kitchen, wide eyed and on high alert. He sighed in relief and let his shoulders slump only after he'd seen that he hadn't really fallen asleep and somehow lost their baby.

He groaned, scrubbing at his tired eyes before reaching out for her.

"I got her," Ryuuji said and nodded toward the Chinese food on the counter. "Sit. Eat."

Rin didn't even hesitate, his whole body sagging with relief as he grabbed a pair of chopsticks and started to eat directly out of one of the cartons. He'd eaten more than half the box before he came up for air, releasing a deeply contented sigh.

"Oh, I needed that so bad," Rin groaned as he slumped down in to a chair, letting his head fall to rest against their kitchen table. Ryuuji snorted and sat down across from him with Lily. Rin looked up at him, his eyes rimmed with dark, tired circles, and smiled.

"She's finally eating," he said as if just noticing.

"She hasn't been?"

Rin shook his head as much as he was able with his cheek still pressed against the table. "She's been refusing feedings and crying all day, and I couldn't figure out why. I was starting to worry she was sick or something."

Ryuuji shook his head, quietly laughing at himself.

"What?" Rin asked, his voice tight with annoyance.

"Nothing," Ryuuji said quickly.

And here he'd thought Rin had some kind of magic touch he lacked.

He looked down at Lily as she released the bottle, smacking her lips, finally having eaten her fill after what had apparently been a long day for all of them.

"Oh, she's done? Here," Rin said standing and reaching for her once more, "She's gotta' be burped now."

"_I got it_," Ryuuji said again, this time more forcefully as he angled her away from him. It was the first time he'd felt like him and Lily had made a real connection, and he wasn't about to let Rin hog her like he usually did, until he or Lily decided they were done.

"Okay, okay," Rin said with a laugh as he held his hands up before going back to the Chinese food.

Ryuuji eyed him warily for a moment before fetching a dish towel and draping it over his shoulder to catch anything Lily might spit up, before positioning her so he could gently pat her back and get rid of any air she might have accidentally ingested. Rin watched him quietly for a moment, a tiny, knowing smirk working its way on to his face.

"Is there anything you _would_ like me to do?" Rin probed innocently, the teasing lilt of his voice making it clear that he was simply offering—and that he'd noticed Ryuuji's unusual defensive posturing.

Ryuuji flushed briefly at having been caught, but sighed even as a resigned smile crossed his lips. He knew he had overreacted, and he felt slightly guilty for even questioning Rin's motives. Perhaps he had been reflecting his own insecurities on to Rin, but at the same time he was almost glad he had been, otherwise he might not have tried so hard to prove himself.

If he hadn't, he might have missed this.

He looked down at Lily who was still for once, not crying, and then back at Rin who was still picking at the remnants of the box of Chinese food.

"Yeah," he said softly, finally answering Rin's question, "Leave some food for me."

Rin laughed, a sharp bark of mirth in the tiny kitchen, and snagged a piece of pork with the chopsticks before leaning across the table, offering it to Ryuuji. He rolled his eyes, but leaned forward and ate it anyway, continuing to bounce Lily, gently patting her back as a comfortable silence fell around them like a blanket, secure and warm.

This… It wasn't so bad. Ryuuji looked across the table to Rin, who smiled when he noticed the glance, holding up another piece of pork in offering. This was how it was supposed to be; a family, a single unit facing their problems together.

Ryuuji leaned forward and took the food again, letting Rin care for him as he cared for their daughter.

If this is what they had to look forward to—little moments like this, where everything clicked together perfectly—then maybe… Maybe all the crying and late nights would be worth it.


	18. And Time Marches On

Hey all~ If you missed it, last weeks updates was a porn story over on AO3 B)

This week is another chapter of mushy family goodness, but I'm trying something new, so we've got a series of short vignettes, sort of like a montage as we cover a lot of time/ground and fast forward through the infant stage. I hope it's not too unusual and you all enjoy it nonetheless.

Thanks as always for reading.

* * *

**And Time Marches On**

When Ryuuji arrives home the smell of dinner greets him in the hallway—the new routine. He's not sure why he ever resisted this… Well, he knows. You don't get paid for work done at the dinner table, but the extra time spent with family is worth it.

He's fully prepared to unload his briefcase and get the last of the day's work done and out of the way, even if he knows Rin will scold him for doing so, but when he enters the kitchen he takes a brief moment to breathe and plant a kiss on Rin's cheek in greeting. Lily is bundled up like a little burrito and slung against Rin's chest as he cooks. She peers up at him with a toothless smile. He'd kiss her too if he could reach from this angle.

"How's my little woman?"

"Oh, Fuck off."

"Language!"

Rin raises a brow and peers at him as he keeps cooking, thoroughly unimpressed.

"It's not like she understands."

"No, but better to break the habit now. Besides, I could have been talking to her."

"Were you?"

"No."

Rin brandishes the spatula like a weapon and Ryuuji laughs as he's chased from the kitchen.

* * *

Lily's cries sound through the apartment late in the night and Ryuuji rolls over to nudge Rin.

"Your turn," he mumbles. The only response is a groan.

It takes him a minute, but Rin does eventually pull himself from the bed to stumble off in to the darkness and see to their daughter's needs. A short while later the crying dies down and Ryuuji drifts back to sleep. He's not sure how much time passes before Rin returns to bed, but he's instantly wide awake; a less than masculine sounding noise escaping his throat the moment cold feet touch his back.

Revenge.

* * *

It starts quite seriously. The temperature has to be perfect and no matter how much the shampoo bottle says 'no tears' Ryuuji doesn't trust it to actually get soap anywhere near Lily's eyes. It's almost nerve wracking at first, and Lily isn't always happy to be bathed, but Ryuuji's happy to help. Rin spends the entire rest of the day with her and does virtually all the other chores on his own now, so it's the least he can do. But it doesn't feel like an obligation. It feels like home.

* * *

Rin is hoofing it through the snow, his breath puffing out in clouds of mist as white flakes dance down around them. Lily's eyes sparkle as she takes in the transformed world, blanketed in snow she's never before seen.

She looks like a little round snowman all bundled up in her thick winter clothes and strapped to his chest in the baby carrier. Her rosy cheeks are the only outward sign of the cold. Rin was hesitant to bring her out, but they've both been cooped up for the past few days and the nursery rhymes and toddler TV is making him batty, so a little fresh air will do them both good; never mind that the air is especially fresh and crisp, like the inside of a freezer.

If it was anyone else they might worry about slipping in the snow, but Rin's feet are as sure as ever as he rounds the hill bringing Futsumaya in to view. A bell above the door rings and they both flush as they enter the slightly too warm exorcist supply shop.

Shiemi's mother sits behind the counter and her eyes light up as she sees them. She puts out her pipe and then holds her hands out for Lily as Rin unstraps her and hands her over before heading in to the back of the shop to find Shiemi. They're family now, and the time spent living there makes him far too comfortable for standard formalities so he doesn't bother to knock or wait for an invitation which is why he's surprised when he finds Shiemi and Yukio sitting at a small table in the back of the shop.

"I was just leaving," Yukio says as he stands and offers his hand to Rin in a much too formal handshake, but Rin pulls him in for the hug he knows his brother won't initiate. A few slaps on the back and a reminder to not be a stranger sees Yukio take his leave. They hear him spare Shiemi's mother a polite farewell and then he's gone and Rin's smile fades.

"Everything alright between you two?" Shiemi asks, her eyes lingering on the door, but the tone of her voice tells him she already knows and is just being polite. She always was particularly perceptive when it came to Yukio.

"He's… still weird about it, you know?"

"About?"

"About Lily. And you and me."

"I'd wondered. He treats her like a stranger."

"More like…" Rin trails off. He doesn't say it, because it sounds worse when he's talking about his daughter instead of himself, but it's the way Yukio's always been. "Well, he always liked you."

And Shiemi giggles which has Rin turning to stare at her, but she's hiding a shy, yet playful smile behind her hand.

"What?"

"He asked me to dinner."

"Oh, no way!"

And before either of them realizes it Rin is pulling her in to a hug and making her swear she'll tell him how it goes before he catches himself and backs off slightly, putting the brakes on his own excitement as he asks whether or not she even agreed to go.

Of course she said yes.

* * *

Old habits die hard, and though Rin tries, Ryuuji can see the toll it's taking on him. Getting up too early leaves him a groggy, barely coherent mess in the morning. Rin tries. He wants to be good at this. He wants to do it right.

Comparatively it's not that much harder for Ryuuji to get up a half hour earlier, tacking it on to his normal morning routine once they settle back in to a regular sleep cycle. More and more frequently Lily sleeps through the night and sometimes, but not often, Ryuuji finds her quietly awake in her crib when he goes in to check on her.

So he feeds her, and he changes her, and he sits with her in the quiet dark of the morning before she falls back asleep and before he carries on with his regular routine, going for a run before getting ready for work, all in the hopes that Rin can get a few more minutes of uninterrupted sleep.

* * *

Rin walks in to the living room only to stop when he catches sight of Ryuuji. He's lying on the floor with his head underneath their coffee table, crawling around as if looking for something out of reach.

"What'cha doing?" Rin asks and Ryuuji jumps, cracking his head against the bottom of the table before curling in to a ball and clutching his head as he hisses in pain. Rin tries very briefly not to laugh before giving in to the temptation, and he's wiping tears from his eyes as Ryuuji peers out from underneath the table to glare at him.

"You done?" he asks, his voice dry and not at all amused as Rin shakes with little aftershocks of laughter.

"Y-yeah," Rin says, wiping away a tear, "So what were you doing down there?"

"Lily's going to start crawling soon. I was making sure the apartment is fully child proof."

"Oh," Rin smiles, then hides it behind his hand as if Ryuuji's said something immensely funny. "Using your own head to check for potential danger?"

Ryuuji grumbles, still rubbing the goose egg on the back of his head as he glances back at the table.

"Kinda'…"

* * *

Ryuuji walks in to the kitchen one day to see a rainbow's array of fruit and vegetables sitting on the counter, some of it still spilling out of grocery bags having just arrived from the store. Rin wrestles the food processor out of a high cupboard he can barely reach while Lily sits in her high chair, banging her bottle against the table and swinging her feet.

"Need some help?"

"Nah, I got it," he says, finally getting the appliance set up on the counter.

"What are you doing?"

"Making baby food. Store bought has too much sugar in it."

The answer is so simple and so "Rin" it doesn't even come as a surprise, but it doesn't quite explain the vast array of produce that fills their kitchen. Ryuuji approaches the counter and grabs a bright pink fruit covered in fleshy spines.

"Dragon fruit?" he asks, "Does she need this?"

Rin shrugs. "I thought it'd be a little more fun than peas and carrots."

"Fair enough, but… Don't you think this is all a bit much for her? She's barely started on solid food."

Rin's shoulders sag and he sighs, taking in the mess on the counter as if seeing it for the first time.

"…I guess."

It's fine though. Food is still food, and they eat the things she doesn't, even as Ryuuji tries to rein him in so as not to stress Lily's tiny developing stomach.

* * *

Ryuuji thinks letting his tail hang loose is a bad idea—has told Rin so on more than one occasion. Rin shrugs him off each time, saying his concern is misplaced, and so they sit in the kitchen together; Ryuuji finishing some last minute paperwork from the office while Rin washes the dishes after dinner. Lily sits in a baby walker in the middle of the room behind him, alternating between babbling and trying to see which of her toys will fit in to her mouth as she bounces on tiny legs.

A tuft of rough black fur sways back and forth, just out of her reach. And she does reach for it. Even if its movements didn't taunt her, she's eager to get her hands on anything and everything, to explore, to experience, and to learn. Part of learning means putting things in her mouth.

"Mother fucker!"

The curse has barely left his mouth as Rin's legs give out and he collapses in front of the sink even as Ryuuji leaps from the table to pry his tail from Lily's mouth. The moment its freed Rin curls it around his stomach, clutching the tender appendage close with a whimper.

"Her teeth are coming in," Ryuuji says, eyeing Rin out of the corner of his eye. He doesn't have to say any more. The look says it all. I told you so.

Instead he just tells Rin to watch his language, and all Rin can do is whimper and nod.

* * *

Rin sleeps on the couch—a much needed nap—as Shiemi sits on the floor with Lily, handing her toys and talking to her. Lily babbles away happily as Shiemi makes quiet meaningless comments of affirmation—"You don't say," and "Well, isn't that interesting," all in an attempt to illicit further 'conversation' from her—when Lily says something that sounds suspiciously like "mama".

Shiemi quietly decides not to tell Rin about that, instead coaxing Lily on her P and D sounds.

* * *

It's a while before Rin wakes to the sound of Lily's crying. Noises alone don't normally do it, so he's not sure how long she's been fussing. It's not supposed to be Rin's night so he rolls over to nudge Ryuuji only to find open, empty bed, cold from lack of body heat. It takes his mind a moment to catch up and remember that Ryuuji was called away on an emergency overnight mission, and he sighs as he drags himself from bed.

He tends to Lily, then returns to collapse in to bed, bundling himself up in the blankets he doesn't have to share, before peering at his phone in the dark.

It's not like he normally tracks him, it's just that at times like these he can't help but worry.

The Find Friend's App says Ryuuji—or at least his phone—is at a hotel. Probably sleeping. Probably safe. Good.

Rin breathes a sigh of relief and lets the phone fall back on the nightstand before drifting back to sleep.

* * *

It becomes a routine he looks forward to, despite the necessary clean up afterword. The puddles on the floor need mopping up and Ryuuji's soaked shirt usually goes right in to the laundry hamper the moment Lily is dried, clothed, and put down for bed, but he doesn't mind.

It starts quite seriously, but it ends with laughter and tiny soap bubble mohawks in dirty blonde hair.

* * *

As far as Rin knows Lily's first word is "Dada", which brings joyful tears to his eyes, even though it could be referring to either him or Ryuuji, or probably neither, given that Lily is unlikely to assign proper meaning to words at this age. He'd like to think she means him though, and Ryuuji doesn't argue. Her next word is "Doggy" which she calls Kuro despite constant correction.

Her vocabulary steadily grows and they've stopped counting words by the time she's sitting in her highchair, banging her sippy cup against the chair only to have it slip from her hands and fall to the floor with a clatter, when she utters her first curse word.

"Damn."

Rin is biting his lip, trying to fight back frustrated tears. He shoots a worried glance at Ryuuji, expecting another "I told you so," only to see him struggling to hold back laughter. Rin does not think it's very funny.

* * *

On sunny days Rin likes to take Lily to the playground, even though it's more for him than her. The fresh air is good, and so is a chance for her to interact with other children, but it's mainly so Rin can get out of the house and see other adults. Sometimes Shiemi comes with him and sometimes not, but the other mothers are always excited to see him.

It's strange how being a parent can be such a complete chick magnet.

* * *

It's a lazy Sunday afternoon filled with laughter and the sound of Rin blowing raspberries on Lily's stomach when someone unexpectedly rings their door buzzer. Rin thinks nothing of it as Ryuuji goes to answer the door while he stays with Lily, but he grows concerned when Ryuuji doesn't immediately return and the silence stretches on.

He peeks in to the hallway to see Ryuuji standing motionless by their front door.

"Who was it?" he asks and Ryuuji starts slightly before looking up at Rin. He's white as a sheet of paper, but a smile slowly makes its way on to his face.

"It's Shima."

"Oh, shit!" Rin says, but quickly catches himself, covering his mouth as he glances back at Lily, hoping she didn't hear him. "Is he coming up?"

"Y-yeah. Of course."

So Rin fetches Lily, who's slightly annoyed at having her play interrupted, and they're standing at the front door, ready to receive him when he arrives.

They're almost shocked to see him. His hair is its natural black now—pink would stand out too much, make him too recognizable—and he's sporting a goatee similar to Ryuuji's. They silently wonder just how long it's been as Shima claps Ryuuji on the back in a half hug without hesitation, only to stop short when he sees Lily in Rin's arms.

"You guys babysitting?" he asks.

They share a stunned look before Ryuuji speaks. Has it really been that long?

"N-No… She's ours."

Shima blinks, his eyes widening.

"No way," he says, but when Rin and Ryuuji just nod a smile breaks out across his face and once again he's clapping Ryuuji on the back.

"Oh my god, you guys! Hang on," he says, and he digs through his bag to pull out a small rectangular cigar box. "I know I'm a little late, but this calls for a celebration."

Rin makes a face, but Ryuuji shakes his head as he leads Shima over to their tiny balcony, a barely 2x5 foot patch of "outdoors" where Rin tries to grow some herbs that Shiemi gave him as a gift, and shuts the door behind them.

"I didn't know you smoked," Ryuuji says as Shima hands him a cigar.

"Technically these were a gift for my dad, but…" He shrugs, "I can't think of a better use for 'em."

Despite his previous comment he bites the tip off and lights the cigar with practiced ease, puffing on the cigar and creating a small cloud of white smoke. It's like this every time now. It has been ever since highschool. Shima goes away and does his own thing and when he returns Ryuuji's left wondering how well he actually knows his old friend, and yet Shima acts like it hasn't been more than a year than the last time they saw each other; like he doesn't disappear to get involved with who knows what, potentially getting himself killed and leaving his friends and family never knowing what happened.

Ryuuji twirls the unlit cigar between his fingers as he leans against the balcony railing.

"Shima… You ever think about-"

"Do not say 'settling down'. I'm gonna' get enough of that shit from my old man when I go home. I'll leave that stuff to Juuzou and Mamushi."

Ryuuji shrugs and a silence passes between them as Shima continues to smoke, occasionally tapping the ash off the end of his cigar, letting it fall off the balcony and disappear in to the wind.

"How old is she?"

"Fourteen months."

"Where'd you two even get a kid?" Shima asks with a laugh.

"Shiemi's the mother."

"Father?"

"Me."

"Oh?" Shima smirks at him and Ryuuji scowls.

"Don't be a perv. All I had to do was jerk off in a cup."

"Fair enough." He takes a long drag on the cigar, doesn't question that Ryuuji hasn't lit his yet, and they simply stand there, enjoying the silence. Ryuuji knows well enough not to bother asking where Shima's been or what he's been doing. It's all top secret undercover stuff and neither Ryuuji nor Rin have the clearance for that kind of thing. Surprisingly Shima takes it pretty seriously.

Before long Shima's cigar has burned down and they go inside to say their goodbyes. It's a long trip back to Kyoto.

They take a moment to formally introduce him to Lily as an uncle, even if it's unlikely that she'll remember him when he'll probably disappear again on another mission for months, if not years at a time, and they make casual plans to meet up again for the few weeks he'll be in the country. It's a good excuse to go spend time with family anyway.

They say their goodbyes and tell him to be safe, and then he's gone.

Later that night, after Lily's been put to bed, Ryuuji ventures back out to the balcony and pulls the cigar from his pocket and lights it. Not for Lily, or the fact that he and Rin are fathers, but for Shima.


	19. Change

Sorry this one's late again. I had trouble with ending it, and I'm still not entirely happy with it. I hope you all enjoy it nonetheless. ;u;

Thanks as always for reading and reviewing.

* * *

**Change**

A deep ache had seated itself in Ryuuji's limbs over a long week of working through the Okinawan heat, but he hurried home in spite of it. He was looking forward to a long bath and some of Rin's cooking. The food provided during away missions was always a little bland, prepared too fast on too small a budget for too many people.

It was early evening when he entered the apartment. It was unusually quiet, but the smell of food greeted him at the door and led him eagerly to the kitchen, where he stopped short in the door way.

Lily was sitting in her high chair with a small assortment of finger food splayed across the tray haphazardly. She grumbled quietly to herself, looking especially frustrated, her tiny brows drawn together in an impressive scowl as she struggled to reach over the side of the chair.

Her sippy cup lay on the floor well out of her reach.

"Do you need help, Sweetheart?" Ryuuji asked her as he scooped it up off the ground and held it out to her. "What do we say?"

"Thank youuuu."

"Good girl." He handed her the cup and ruffled her hair, kissing her quickly on the head before stepping around her to check on Rin.

Normally Rin would have retrieved the cup the second it hit the ground. Sometimes, his heightened senses even allowed him to go from cooking or cleaning to catching the cup before it had fallen half way to the floor. The fact that it had been sitting on the floor, discarded and ignored, was disconcerting.

Ryuuji stepped up to Rin's side and found him frying an omelette on autopilot. He was staring blankly at the wall, his eyelids at half-mast as he went through the motions of cooking without thought, as if his body had simply memorized the necessary muscle impulses. He almost looked like he was sleeping with his eyes open, except for only one other sign of life. He was humming under his breath. It was something Ryuuji recognized but it took him a moment to place; the theme song to one of the children shows that Lily liked.

"Rin?"

"Mmm?"

Rin looked up at him slowly, his gaze coming in to focus, and then blinked, instantly alert as if Ryuuji's presence had flipped some internal switch.

"Oh! Welcome home," he said, smiling. "I got your text. I assume you're hungry."

He plated the omelette and put it on the table, before taking a seat and waiting patiently, watching Ryuuji with expectant eyes. Ryuuji sat and started to eat. This was part of their ritual. He wasn't really home unless he'd eaten some of Rin's cooking.

"How was the mission?" Rin asked.

"Fine," Ryuuji answered between bites.

"Anything interesting happen?"

"Not really. We were mainly just renegotiating contracts with all the island's lion dogs, and everything went off without issue. It was more about having the necessary man power to get the whole island done quickly than anything else."

He went back to eating, but the way Rin was watching him was almost unsettling. There was something manic in his attention. Ryuuji paused mid-bite.

"…Did anything interesting happen while I was gone?"

"Not really," Rin said with a sigh, unintentionally parroting back Ryuuji's answer.

"No?"

Rin shrugged.

"Did Shiemi come over?"

"Nah, she was busy with the shop and work."

"Did you go anywhere? Take Lily to the park?"

"The weather wasn't any good."

"…Did you go out at all?"

"I went grocery shopping."

Ryuuji eyed him carefully.

"Have you spoken to any other adults this week at all?"

"The clerk at the grocery store… Does that count? I mean, she did look kinda' young…"

"Rin…?"

"What?"

Ryuuji paused a moment, gathering his thoughts. He glanced at Lily who was quietly content, sitting in her high chair as she played with a bit of mashed banana, trying to eat it with uncoordinated little hands.

"You remember how when we first spoke about becoming parents we both agreed you'd eventually go back to work?"

"Well, yeah, but… When Lily's older, right?"

"It could be now," Ryuuji offered, trying to sound positive, reaching across the table to take Rin's hand as the other boy tried to withdraw.

Rin's eyes darted between their daughter and Ryuuji's grip, his lip trembling.

"I-I can't," he said, "She needs me."

"Of course she does," Ryuuji said, rubbing his thumb over Rin's knuckles, "But not all the time. Not just you. There's me, and Shiemi-"

"But…"

"It doesn't have to be fulltime," Ryuuji said softly, "You could simply go back on-call."

"Yeah… But…"

"We can always leave her with her grandmother if we have to. You know that."

"But… But what if," Rin closed his eyes, biting his lip before continuing, his voice barely a whisper, "What if I die?"

Ryuuji actually snorted and received a very dark glare from Rin in return.

"What the h-_heck_ is so funny?" Rin asked, his voice hard, but most of the effect had been lost when he curbed his language—it still sounded so unnatural coming from him—and Ryuuji had to suppress laughter before he could continue seriously.

"Rin, what if _I_ die? In fact, given your unnatural healing ability, my death is much more likely. Maybe we should switch. You go back to work and I'll be the stay at home dad."

"Very funny," Rin said, his words clipped.

"I'm being serious," Ryuuji said, "Well, not about me staying home, but about you working. You're bored. I know you won't admit it, but I can tell, and going back to work doesn't make you a bad father."

"I know," Rin said as he raked his fingers through his hair. "I know, I just…"

"Daddy?"

They turned to Lily who was watching them intently with her hand in her mouth.

"What is it, Pumpkin?" Rin asked.

"What's 'die'?"

Rin whimpered, his knuckles white as he gripped the table.

"That," Ryuuji said standing quickly, "Is a loaded question."

"Why?"

He turned to Rin, completely ignoring their daughter's question. "Why don't you go get in the bath. I'll clean up here and Lily and I will come join you."

Rin nodded weakly as he stood, leaving the kitchen without a word.

"Daaaaaad."

"Yes?" Ryuuji asked sweetly.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

Lily opened her mouth and took a deep breath to answer, but stopped, pursing her lips and pinching her brow as she realized she'd already forgotten the question. Ryuuji tried not to laugh and then spent the next few minutes fielding questions from his daughter as he washed the dishes.

"Ready for bath time?" he asked when he had finished and started to unbuckle the high chair seat.

"No, thank you!"

She tried to slip through his arms the second the tray was out of the way and the harness was undone, but she only made it a few steps before he caught her and scooped her up under his arm, eliciting a squeal.

"Can't have you going to bed like a dirty little dust bunny," he said as she flailed, kicking her feet in a futile effort to free herself as Ryuuji carried her to the bathroom.

Steam wafted out as Ryuuji opened the door, and he quickly undressed them both, placing the dirty clothes in to the nearby hamper. When he opened the door to the actual bathing area Lily scurried inside and ran right up to the edge of the tub before trying to climb in.

"Gotta' get clean first, Peanut," Rin said, poking her in the forehead, "You know the rules."

She gave him a fierce set of puppy dog eyes before going back to the wash basin so Ryuuji could scrub her down from head to toe, but she was giggling by the end of it as Ryuuji lifted her in to the tub.

Rin watched her with a soft smile as she began to splash about on the opposite side of the tub, playing with a small plastic dolphin. He grabbed a plastic dinosaur from her box of bath toys and joined her.

Ryuuji took his time, scrubbing away what felt like a week's worth of dirt and sweat. The hotel had showers, obviously, but there was nothing quite like the comfort of a shower in your own home, followed by a long, hot soak.

When he was thoroughly clean he sat on the sidelines, waiting—there wasn't enough room in the tub for three people. He eventually gave Lily the five minute bed time warning, letting her get her whining out of the way, before lifting her out of the tub and drying her off. He patted himself down too, not drying off completely, but just enough that he could get Lily in to her pajamas and put her to bed without trailing water throughout their apartment.

When he returned Rin was leaning back in the tub, his body completely submerged with only his head and the tip of his tail lolling over the edge.

Rin shifted in the tub, leaning forward so Ryuuji could sit behind him, and then cuddled up against his chest, letting his head rest against his shoulder and then they just sat like that, comfortable in the omnipresent silence of the steam filled bathroom, the occasional drip of condensation punctuating the absence of other sound.

A quiet ripple of water echoed throughout the room as Rin shifted, turning his face in towards Ryuuji's neck.

"Do you think I should?" he asked softly.

"Hmmm?"

"Go back to work?"

"I think it would suit you," Ryuuji said.

"…Do you think I'm selfish?"

"Why would I think that?"

"What you said earlier…You were right. You're in more danger working than I'd ever be. But I wanted to stay home with Lily…"

Ryuuji wrapped his arms around Rin's waist and tucked the other boy's head under his chin, holding him close.

"You know it's not that simple. Why are you second guessing this now? We discussed this thoroughly before we had Lily."

Rin shrugged. "I dunno'."

"I know you're protective of Lily. And of me," Ryuuji said, "But I can take care of myself, and Lily will be fine. Stay at home, or go back to work. I don't mind either way. I just thought you'd be happier."

"Maybe…"

"You don't have to make a decision right now," Ryuuji said, running his fingers through Rin's damp hair. "It was just a suggestion."

The half demon sighed in response, the sound swallowed up by the acoustics of the room and almost going unheard.

"I don't like thinking about things like this," Rin said.

"Then don't," Ryuuji shrugged, jostling Rin's head from its perch against his shoulder. "You'll just go with your gut anyways."

Rin made a discontented sound in the back of his throat—half hum, half grumble—that was neither agreement nor denial.

"You're right though."

"About what."

"I have been bored. I love spending time with Lily, b-but-!"

"Of course you do." Ryuuji cut him off before he could waste time needlessly trying to defend his statement. "I love spending time with her too, but I also love spending time with you. And my friends and parents. And… _some_ of my coworkers…" he added after a slight hesitation, "I love my job, even when I'm just sitting behind a desk. I make a difference. I also like spending time by myself. Everything in moderation, right?"

"Yeeeeeah," Rin said softly, "I do kind of miss it. Working with you and the others."

"Mmhmm. I've been kind of lonely at work," Ryuuji said with a soft chuckle, his laughter creating ripples in the water.

"Not that we'd be able to work together when we've got Lily to worry about."

"True. The organization takes parents in to account when assigning team missions. We'd never be paired together."

"Still… it might be nice to get back out in to the field a little."

"And if you only sign up for on-call work you don't have to worry about getting stuck behind a desk."

"True," Rin said with a nod, sounding decidedly more optimistic than he had just a few minutes ago, but then he slumped back against Ryuuji, releasing a groan.

"What do we tell Lily?"

"Maybe nothing? She's used to you not being around 24/7."

"We have to tell her something eventually… Don't we? … About me?"

"I think," Ryuuji said carefully, "when that time comes, we'll know it. For now I think it would just worry her, if she even understood."

Rin sunk down in to the water until his head was submerged, blowing bubbles in the water with another long, drawn out sigh. He then just stayed like that, long enough that Ryuuji leaned over him curiously.

"Rin?"

He breached the water suddenly, rolling over in Ryuuji's lap and leaning over him as water streamed off his body.

"I don't want to talk about it anymore," he said, bracing his arms on the edge of the tub as he leaned over Ryuuji.

"Then let's talk about something else."

"Let's do something other than talk," Rin said as he leaned in and kissed him softly.

Ryuuji nodded wordlessly as he cupped Rin's cheek, tracing his jawline with his thumb. He let his eyes fall shut as he kissed him back, fairly confident that Rin had already made up his mind.


	20. Lullaby

Hi everyone :9

Sorry, if you only follow me on here. I've been busy working on a story over on AO3. You know that means it's got adult content. Please head on over to my account on AO3 (KorrinBelle) if you're interested. But for the near future you can look forward to a few more chapters of Domesticia on a weekly basis.

In other exciting news, I started a crowdfunding account on a website that starts with a 'P'~! ヾ(*´∀｀*)ﾉ You know the one. Apparently I can't say their name here. At All. Because this website is run by control freak censor nazis.

If you're so inclined you can become a "patron" of my work and support my writing and receive access to scrapped works, WIPs, planning notes, and various other things. If you're interested, head on over to (the name of the crowdfunding website that starts with a P) dot com slash korrinbelle

And now, along the same line~

This chapter of Domesticia is brought to you by VineTabris, Jaiden, and Angerawr. Thanks so much for supporting me!

Now... after what is probably the longest introductory note I've ever written, I hope you enjoy the story. Thanks as always for reading and commenting. It means a lot to me. (´∀｀人)

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**Lullaby**

It was evening when Rin arrived home, past Lily's bedtime, which explained why no one came to greet him. He would have liked to think he was worth a better welcome after his first day back on the job, but it was probably for the best that he wasn't greeted with any kind of special fanfare.

Lily had seemed fine when they first told her Rin was going back to work, but when the day came, and she realized what it really meant, she'd clung to his legs and cried. Rin had to watch as Ryuuji pried her off and then turn his back on her as she howled, fat tears trailing down her cheeks as she struggled in Ryuuji's arms, trying to reach him. Rin could still hear the cries well down the hallway as he left the building. It certainly hadn't made things easy on him either.

Now, he was simply too tired and dirty to care. He kicked his shoes off in the entryway and headed straight towards the bathroom where he practically fell in to the shower after dropping his clothes haphazardly on the floor. He'd wash up first and then go kiss his daughter goodnight, even if she was already asleep. It was a ritual he hadn't yet missed even once, and he didn't plan to start now if he could help it.

It wasn't until he was finished, feeling refreshed and a little more human, that he realized he hadn't seen hide nor hair of Ryuuji either. Lily might have been in bed at this hour, but there was no way Ryuuji was too—it wasn't that late—yet most of the apartment lights were low and silence filled the air.

Almost.

On the edge of Rin's hearing—still blown out from the sound of the shower he'd just had—was a low, soothing baritone—the sound of Ryuuji's voice.

Rin tiptoed down the hallway and peaked in to his daughter's room. A thin sliver of light pierced the room from behind him and fell upon the room's occupants. Ryuuji and Lily both looked up to see who was intruding on their space, but only for a moment. Ryuuji didn't even slow in his recitation of the children's book he held, even as he gave Rin a slight wave in greeting. Well, that was his Aria habits coming through. When he read out loud he gave it his full attention. The difference was that in the rush of battle, Ryuuji's voice was powerful, commanding, unyielding. Here, it was soft, steady and comforting. His voice was clear even though he was speaking in hushed tones and the rough drawl of his Kansai-ben felt oddly like home.

"What'chya reading?" Rin asked as he approached the bed, only for Lily to shush him. She did however pat the space on the bed beside her, inviting him to join them, so he did. He kissed her quickly on the forehead before scrambling across the blankets to lie down beside her on the edge of her tiny bed where she curled up in the crook of his arm. There wasn't even so much as a stutter of hesitation as Ryuuji continued Lily's bedtime story.

Rin wasn't so much interested in the story or the words themselves as he was in cuddling up against his daughter's side as Ryuuji's voice washed over him. Bedtime story? It was almost a lullaby, and Rin felt his eyelids drooping as the exhaustion of the day—temporarily chased away by his shower—settled back in to his bones and caught up with him as he rested his head against Lily's.

"The end," Ryuuji read a while later, finally looking up from the book only to be met with the sight of his daughter, her arms thrown haphazardly up over her head, and his husband with his arm thrown over Lily's chest, both of them sound asleep.

"Rin," Ryuuji whispered, "Rin, wake up." He reached over and shook his husband's shoulder, trying to stir him without waking their daughter, but Rin only snorted, scratched his nose, and mumbled something incoherent as he slipped in to a deeper slumber. Ryuuji sighed and circled the bed, slipping his arms under Rin's frame and lifting him with a grunt.

"How many children do I have?" Ryuuji asked the darkness sarcastically as he looked down at Rin's prone form in his arms, the other man's head lolled to the side. Ryuuji sighed as he slipped out of their daughter's room with Rin in his arms, softly toeing the door shut behind them.


	21. The Wrong Park

So, I only just realized that this website scrubs certain words from files. Like the NAME of the damn website I TRIED TO ADVERTISE in the last update! So, if you were confused by what I said in the intro, that's why... I made an account on Patreôn. The My username is KorrinBelle. Please look me up at Patreôn (with a regular O instead of a funky one) dot com slash korrinbelle if you're interested in getting updates early as well as bonus content like WIPs and access to livestreams of the writing process, etc...

This week's story is brought to you buy VineTabris, Jaiden, Senem, and Angerawr!

Thank you so much for supporting me. (∗∕ ∕•̥̥̥̥∕ω∕•̥̥̥̥∕)

But thank you as well to everyone who continues to read and comment on the story here. I hope you enjoy~

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**The Wrong Park**

"Here we are, Sweetie," Ryuuji said as he and Lily entered the park hand in hand.

It was a beautiful warm Sunday. The sun was shining brightly and it was the perfect chance for a little father-daughter bonding, not to mention a chance for Rin to get out, relax, and socialize with adults, something he was still missing from his life even after going back to work. It was still only the occasional call in shifts after all, and working with coworkers wasn't the same thing as unwinding with friends.

He glanced down at Lily who was still clinging to him with her tiny fingers.

"Is something the matter?"

She fidgeted as she looked up at him, her tiny brows drawn together as she considered her answer.

"It's the wrong park."

Ryuuji snorted. "Maybe it's not the one Rin brings you to, but that doesn't make it wrong. Do you want to go on the swings? I can push you."

Lily pursed her lips and shook her head, but released his hand none the less before making her way towards the sandbox. Ryuuji took a seat on a nearby bench and began to watch Lily as she played.

The park was relatively new; brightly colored with fresh paint and sporting the latest in child safe playground equipment. No rusty swings or old splintered seesaws for kids to smack their heads against.

And yet, it was oddly quiet for mid-afternoon on a Sunday. He would have thought the park would be swarming with families, yet there were only a few mothers clustered together across the park as they idly chatted, only half watching their children even as most of the kids seemed to avoid each other, playing by themselves.

It happened so quick he almost missed it; Lily's surprised squawk drew his attention back just in time to see a young boy finish dumping a bucket of sand on her head. He was on his feet in seconds, her name on the tip of his tongue as she stood and shoved the other child to the ground.

The boy had barely started to cry before an unholy shriek broke the calm of the park. Ryuuji could only watch as one of the mothers broke from the cluster and charged across the park, grabbing Lily by her arm and wrenching her up.

"Who's child is this?!"

Ryuuji saw red and his hands itched for a trigger, but this wasn't combat. That woman wasn't a demon. His nostrils flared as he took a deep breath and tried to force down the instinctive urge to fight, to protect, and clenched his fists as he silently marched across the park, towards the woman holding his daughter. She momentarily paled at his approach, shrinking as he glowered down at her before straightening herself up and returning the look for all she was worth.

"Oh," she said simply, her voice dripping with disdain. "That explains it."

He held out his hand and the woman flinched as if she thought he was going to hit her, her grip loosening enough for Lily to brake free, and she grabbed Ryuuji's hand and scrambled behind his legs, still trying to wipe the sand off her face even as she held back frustrated tears.

"Your child assaulted my boy," the woman said coldly, the tone of her voice demanding something, though Ryuuji had no idea what it was and he rolled his eyes before he could stop himself. The woman crossed her arms over her chest and glared down her nose at him, as much as she was able to look "down" at someone who was a whole head taller than her. He couldn't remember the last time someone had so obviously judged him based on appearances, but that's exactly what the woman was doing, sizing him up, seeing the piercings and the hair and making her assumptions. He resisted the urge to punch her right in the face and took a deep breath, instead trying to think of what Rin would do. Well, maybe not what Rin would do. He wanted people to like him too much and Ryuuji certainly didn't want or need this woman's respect, but he still needed to be a good example for Lily.

"She shouldn't have done that," he said firmly as he looked down at Lily, speaking as much to her as to the woman, "And she'll apologize if your son apologizes for dumping sand on her."

"My Yacchan would never do such a thing," she said, crinkling her nose, "He's a good boy."

"She's covered in sand!"

"Well I don't know how you teach your daughter to play, but my son is neater than that."

"Lady, I saw him do it!"

"Are you calling me a liar?"

"No, I'm calling you an idiot-" he stopped as Lily tugged on his hand, and he ignored the woman's outraged squawk and the how-dare-you's as he knelt so Lily could lean in close and whisper in his ear.

"Daaaad, I told you," she said, tears still evident in her voice as she continued to wipe sand from her face with a frustrated little whine, "It's the wrong park."

Ryuuji looked up at the woman who was still waving her fists as she screamed at him, making a complete spectacle of herself, then over at the cluster of other woman who were whispering furiously to each other behind their hands as they watched the scene, and it clicked.

The reason the park was practically deserted despite the beautiful day and brand new playground equipment.

"Aha!" he said, "You're right. This is the wrong park, isn't it?"

Lily nodded, sniffling back tears as Ryuuji took her hand and led her out of the park, still ignoring the woman's shouts. When they were a good distance away they stopped and he dried her tears and brushed the sand from her hair and clothes, then gave her a quick talk about not resorting to violence to get her way, but… It's not like he was one to talk after all.

Then, after a quick call to Rin, they were on their way again and it wasn't long before they arrived at their new destination.

This park was definitely older, but it was the wear and tear that came with being well used, rather than abandoned; nothing a new coat of paint wouldn't fix, not that the children scrambling across the equipment cared about the quality of the paint job or the color scheme.

Ryuuji gave Lily's hand a quick squeeze before he released her to go play and this time she headed off immediately, making a direct beeline for a group of other kids she clearly recognized. They greeted each other by name, and then made space for her, before getting right back in to the rhythm of whatever game they'd been playing.

He smiled to himself as he looked for a place to sit, but unlike the other park most of the benches were occupied. After a few moments of feeling completely lost he noticed a group of parents waving him over. He glanced over his shoulder to make sure they weren't waving at someone else, and then made his way over to where they were standing.

"You must be Rin's husband?" one of the women said, and a few of them tittered behind their hands much as the women at the previous park had done, though Ryuuji got the impression they were simply laughing at some joke he wasn't privy to, rather than taking pleasure at his expense.

"Ah, yeah…" he said, brushing the back of his neck awkwardly, "I guess, Rin comes here often with Lily?"

"Yeah," one of the women cooed, "He's told us all about you. Rin is so lucky."

"O-oh… um… Thank you?" he said awkwardly, not really sure if he should be pleased or worried. These women were sizing him up too, but it was definitely not like it had been at the other park. Ryuuji sighed. He got the feeling that even if he didn't say anything, Rin would hear all about this later, and it would probably be a while before he heard the end of it.


	22. Tea Time

I feel like everything's been all fluff all the time lately, though that won't last much longer. I couldn't resist the scenario in this chapter. -w-b

This chapter is brought to you thanks to the support of VineTabris, Jaiden, Senem, and Angerawr.

As always, thanks for reading. (´∀｀人)

* * *

**Tea Time**

The kettle whistled for only a moment before Rin deftly removed it from the hot element and set it aside, but it had been more than long enough and the patter of tiny feet sounded as Lily hurried in to the kitchen, sliding to a stop on the linoleum floor.

"Daddy, is it ready?" Lily asked, her eyes sparkling as she practically vibrated, her pigtails and little pink tutu bouncing up and down.

"Almost," Rin said, trying to suppress a smile at his daughter's excitement as he pulled a little step stool from the corner and placed it beside him. He then stretched up, opening the cupboard above the stove. "What kind do you want?"

Lily adjusted her skirt and hopped on to the step stool. She pursed her lips and tapped her chin as if thinking deeply on the matter before throwing a hand up in to the air and shouting. "Orange Pekoe!"

Rin chuckled as he pulled the tea bags down and handed them to her, watching her carefully as she placed two of them in to her tiny decorative tea pot, and then struggled to lift the kettle with tiny hands. It was heavy, but not more than she could manage—this was by no means her first tea party—but Rin hovered protectively over her shoulder nonetheless, just in case she slipped or dropped the kettle.

"Daddy~!" Lily said, drawing the title out in a dramatic whine, "Don't just stand there. Get the other stuff."

"Oh, right." He hesitated until she had finished pouring and set the kettle back down on the counter, then began helping her prepare the other things she'd need: cream, sugar, honey, a few slices of lemon—just in case—and the pièce de résistance, the vanilla squares he'd prepared the night before. All he had to do was dust them with icing sugar and cut them in to actual squares and they'd be perfect.

Lily arranged everything artfully on her little serving tray and then hopped down from her step stool so Rin could hand it to her. Once again, it was just slightly too heavy and the dishes rattled slightly as her grip shook with effort, but she began slowly, carefully making her way towards her room.

Rin watched her until she rounded the corner and then returned to the vanilla squares, adding the finishing touches before bringing them to Lily.

Rin cracked a smirk as he entered the small messy room. Ryuuji was sitting—if you could call it that. It looked more like squatting—on a tiny plastic chair covered in peeling stickers and child-sized hand prints made out of non-toxic acrylic paint. He was seated at a tiny table across from Lily. A plastic tiara sat nested more on top of his hair than on his head, and he was holding a tea cup so small he could barely fit one finger through the dainty little handle. He looked up as Rin entered, glaring when he noticed the tight little smirk on Rin's face, a look that screamed, "Say it. I dare you. Say anything at all, and I will end you."

Rin couldn't resist.

"Are my two favorite princesses enjoying their tea party?" It was worth it for the way Ryuuji's face darkened, his glare intensifying and his jaw tightening with the effort not to say anything in response to Rin's teasing, lest it upset their daughter.

"We're not princesses, Daddy, geez," Lily said, rolling her eyes, stopping Rin short.

"You're not?"

"I'm a queen, and Dad is a king," she said

"Yeah," Ryuuji said, looking up at Rin with a cocky smirk, "I'm the king, and as a matter of fact, we _are_ enjoying our tea party."

"Oh," Rin said dumbly, still standing there, holding the tray of desserts, "…Can I join you?"

Lily clicked her tongue. "Who ever heard of the maid joining the king and queen for tea?" Lily said as she turned up her nose and rolled her eyes as if he simply should have known better.

"Maid?!" Rin sputtered. "I'll have you know, I'm not the maid," he said, placing the tray down on the tiny table, "I'm a tickle monster!"

He dove on Lily and she shrieked with laughter as he dug his fingers in to her sides, tickling her without mercy for the insult. He was completely unprepared for the assault that came from behind.

"How dare you attack the queen!" Ryuuji said dramatically as he jumped in to the fray, tickling Rin and pulling him off of their daughter as they all fell to the floor in a shrieking pile.

The struggle continued for a moment until Rin scrambled up off the floor, red faced and out of breath and still fighting the urge to laugh, and fled to the safety of the hallway. He stopped and turned to shake his fist dramatically.

"You'll pay for this insult!" he shouted, his maniacal laughter echoing through the apartment hallway as he made his retreat.

It took Ryuuji and Lily a moment to catch their breath, but when they did Ryuuji stood and offered a hand to his daughter and pulled her chair out for her, making sure she was seated comfortably before sitting back down on his own tiny pink chair.

Lily smoothed out her skirt and her hair, took a deep breath to compose herself and then turned back to Ryuuji. "Do you take sugar in your tea?" she asked him with all the grace and composure of a queen who hadn't just had someone make an attempt on her very life.

"Lemon, please."


	23. The Importance of Being Prepared

When I first started to write this chapter I thought it'd be the "Father does daughter's hair" chapter, but somehow it became this. :')  
I just thought that Ryuuji would be better at styling hair, not just because he's had so much practice with his own, but because it's kind of the one thing that is "his and Lily's".

I also deliberately left it vague about exactly how old Lily is and what "school" she's starting. Though the majority of children are enrolled in kindergarten, it's not mandatory in Japan, so it's not part of the standard teaching curriculum. Not that I'll be writing tons of chapters with her in this grade. I'll be continuing to jump the timeline very rapidly, except for next two chapters which will actually be direct continuations of this chapter. :D

Those two chapters are already available on my Patre0n for anyone who's interested.

Aaaaand once again, this chapter has been brought to you by Jaiden, VineTabris, Senem, and Angerwar! Thank you everyone for your support and words of encouragement, and as always, I hope you enjoy reading~!

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**The Importance of Being Prepared**

Sometimes the way Ryuuji always had to plan and research and prepare for everything really got on Rin's nerves. He found it draining—always having to follow a schedule—and it was hard to be spontaneous when you had to pencil activities in between three people's schedules.

This wasn't one of those times though. Right now Rin was thankful.

"Lily! Breakfast is ready!" he called as he plated the food, setting it out for her. His own breakfast was not so neatly prepared, and he'd been eating while he cooked in an effort to save time. "Lily, you're going to be late!" he called again.

It was the much anticipated first day of school, and Ryuuji was not there. He'd been called away late the previous night for an emergency mission, leaving Rin to tackle the responsibilities of being a parent on his own. Not entirely alone though. They'd already done a tour of the school, figured out where her class was and met Lily's teacher, and before leaving on his mission Ryuuji had packed Lily's backpack with everything she'd need and set out her school uniform for her—he'd even labeled her jacket and shoes so they wouldn't get lost. All Rin had to do was feed her and get her to school on time. It was turning out to be not such a simple task.

He knew she was awake—she'd been so excited she'd practically jumped out of bed the moment he went in to wake her—but what was taking her so long?

He made his way to her bedroom and found it empty. The bathroom door, however, was closed, and he could hear her fumbling about inside.

Rin knocked on the door. "Peanut, you doin' okay?"

The door flew open and Lily stood before him, tears in her eyes, her hair a mess of barrettes and hair ties. She had tried to do her hair herself, and it stood up in bunches at odd angles as she'd failed to properly secure the hair ties around her pigtails.

"Y-you have to help me," she sputtered, sniffling pitifully and wiping away tears, "You have to do my hair like Dad does."

"O-of course," he said, trying not to laugh.

He grabbed a brush and sat down on the edge of the bathtub. She sat between his legs with her back to him and he started to undo her mess, unclipping all the barrettes and trying to remove the tangled hair ties.

"Ow!"

"Sorry, Pumpkin. You kinda' made a mess of it."

She hunched her shoulders and Rin could practically hear the pout in her voice.

"Dad doesn't pull my hair when he does it."

"I ain't doing it on purpose," Rin said, his own pout in full force, "Besides, Dad normally doesn't start by having to fix your mess."

He finished removing the hair ties and started to brush her hair out neatly, mindful of the tangles she'd created, then parted her hair evenly, more or less, as he tried to remember how Ryuuji normally did it.

When he finished he sat back to survey his work, pursing his lips in a slight frown. One of the pigtails was too loose and they were lopsided. He undid one of them and tried again, but that result wasn't much better, and Lily winced as he tugged at her hair, trying to get it to obey. In the end he undid everything and opted for a much easier ponytail, accented with a few sparkly barrettes.

"How's that?" he asked as he held her up in front of the mirror. After a moment of intense thought she nodded her head.

"It'll do."

"Oh, gee… Thanks," Rin said sarcastically as he put her back down. He wasn't that hurt though. It wasn't that Rin never did her hair, but it had sort of become something that Ryuuji and Lily did together, and Rin just wasn't very good at doing anything fancy. Ryuuji was used to spending large amounts of time styling his own hair, and it had spoiled Lily.

"Ready for breakfast?"

"Yeah!" She perked up and raced out of the bathroom, leaving Rin to clean up her mess. When he made his way back out to the kitchen she was already busy gobbling down her meal.

They were running a little behind schedule by the time she finished eating, but Rin took a moment to inspect her uniform, smoothing out the creases and making sure her buttons were done up correctly. It had been a long time since he'd cared about something like that. The desire to impress teachers and other students had died when he realized most of them had made up their minds about the kind of student—the kind of person—he was, but he would be damned before he'd give them a reason to think anything less than the best of his daughter.

"Ready?" he asked.

She nodded quickly, balling her hands in to tiny fists as she tried to contain her excitement.

"Nervous?" Rin asked as he put on his own coat and shoes.

She shook her head, but her cheeks were flushed and her mouth was set in a hard line. Rin smiled, snorting to himself. She looked like a tiny warrior going off to fight an unwinnable battle, prepared to go down with a fight for some worthy cause.

Rin took Lily's hand and glanced at his watch as they left the apartment. Shit.

* * *

They had to run to catch the bus and Lily was out of breath by the time they arrived, even though Rin had carried her part way, only putting her back down once they approached the school. He didn't want to embarrass her, even if she was still probably too young to care about something like that. He didn't want to embarrass himself either, or have the other parents or teachers judge him and make assumptions about her in kind.

The school was bustling with activity. Parents, students, and teachers alike swarmed the school like ants as they all hurried through the final preparations of the big day. Rin clutched Lily's hand tightly as they navigated the crowd, making their way to her classroom where they lingered beside the door.

Rin knelt in front of her, brushing her uniform off once more and giving her one final look over to make sure he hadn't forgotten anything even though it was far too late to fix things even if he had. Everything had to be okay. She would make friends. They would like her. Everyone liked her… Well, he might have been a bit biased there.

"Daddy, are you okay?" Lily asked, and Rin stopped, looking up to meet her eyes. She smiled brightly and threw her arms around his neck, squeezing him tightly while he sat there, stunned.

"Don't worry," she said, "Everything'll be okay."

He blinked, letting the tension ease out of him as he realized how concerned he must have looked if his own daughter was comforting him. He forced himself to smile and laugh, hoping it sounded more confident to Lily than it did to him.

"Dad went over my numbers and letters with me last night, and I'll be polite and follow the rules and make lots of friends, so you don't have to worry," she said as she flashed him a confident smile, puffing out her chest as she braced her hands on her hips.

He actually laughed at that. Ryuuji _would_ do that, wouldn't he—not even in school yet, and Ryuuji was already tutoring her. Well, at least Lily felt prepared.

At least one of them was doing this properly. Her first day and he'd almost gotten her there late. Almost.

Rin pulled her in for one last hug and then clung to her, taking a deep breath as he prepared himself to let her go. It was, and at the same time, was not like when he had gone back to work. He was pretty certain she'd only cried then because _he'd_ made a bigger deal out of it than necessary—It wasn't like that was the first time they'd ever been separated. Shiemi and her mother occasionally watched her. Ryuuji sometimes spent time alone with her to give Rin the day off. She'd even stayed at a daycare or with a babysitter on more than one occasion when everyone had been busy and Rin and Ryuuji had needed to take some time off for themselves. This was… It was different. It marked a much bigger change, not in their relationship, but in Lily's growth and independence. Once more, he was apparently prepared to make a much bigger deal out of it than she was.

He felt a little bit as if he wasn't necessary in her life anymore, even though he knew that was absurd. He was her father. That would never change.

He released her from the hug and she planted a sloppy kiss on his cheek before turning towards the classroom.

"Thank you, Daddy! I love you!" she said, waving at him over her shoulder before she hurried in to the room to introduce herself.

"I- You're welcome. I love you too!" he shouted after her before she was out of earshot. He wasn't sure what she had thanked him for, but it didn't matter. Whatever she needed, he would do it. He would be there even if she didn't need him, just in case.

He watched her from the doorway for a moment, making sure she was comfortable and well situated, and then stepped aside. His eyes prickled with tears, and he swiped them away quickly as he retreated from the school, happy as much as he was sad, and not wanting Lily to see him upset. Once he was outside the building and out of everyone else's way he took a moment to calm himself, contemplating his newfound freedom. He hadn't made plans with anyone and felt as if he suddenly had no idea what he was supposed to do with himself now that there was no daughter to take to the park or play with, even though there was still plenty of- ugh- chores that needed doing. Well… There was that new issue of manga he'd wanted to buy, and that show he'd wanted to catch up on, and he could always just take a nap. Naps were good. Naps had gotten him through some hard times.

There was also that interesting cake recipe he'd seen online which he wanted to try…

Yes. That's what he'd do. Lily's first day of school was a pretty big event after all, come to think of it—definitely worthy of celebration and cake.

The spring had already returned to his step as he left the grounds and made his way back home.


	24. Down Time

Just a warning, this chapter contains some light sexual content. Nothing major or graphic. Hope you enjoy~!

This chapter was brought to you by VineTabris, Jaiden, Senem, and Angerawr~ Thank you all for supporting me on Patre0n（´ω｀人）~

* * *

**Down Time**

The phone rang right around eight, just as Lily was getting in to bed, so rather than listen to a bedtime story she spoke on the phone with Ryuuji until she drifted off to sleep. She relayed her first day at school and he peppered her with questions. Did she have fun? Did she remember to share during recess? Did she like her teacher?

They went around and around like that until Lily's yawns made it hard for her to talk and before they knew it Rin was pulling the phone from her limp hand and tucking her in. He kissed her forehead, turned off the light, and slipped out of the room.

"You still there?" he asked, holding the phone up to his ear.

"Yeah, I'm still here," Ryuuji's voice came softly over the line, "How was your day?"

"Not bad. Lily was almost late for school, but-"

"Rin…" It was one syllable, just his name drawn out, but Ryuuji's displeasure was audible.

"Hey, I said almost. Geez, give me some credit."

Ryuuji snorted. "Did she have any homework?"

"What kind of evil teacher gives homework on the first day?"

"I take it that's a 'no'?"

Rin scoffed even as he raced to the front of their apartment where he'd dropped Lily's backpack the moment they got home.

"Ch'yeah, that's a no," he said, clicking his tongue as he flipped the bag open and dumped the contents on to the floor. Her favorite stuffed animal, a pack of crayons, the remnants of her lunch, and a piece of paper all fell out. Rin snatched up the piece of paper, smoothing out the creases as his eyes darted over it.

"There was just something for us… about… About the kinds of things Lily will be learning and how we can help her at home," he said as he finished skimming it. "As if you didn't already have that figured out."

Ryuuji grunted, a noncommittal sound of acknowledgment that had Rin breathing a sigh of relief. Looks like he was off the hook for that lapse in parental attention. Well, he was the "fun" parent anyway. Ryuuji could worry about the boring shit like homework, since he actually enjoyed it.

"So that was Lily's day. How about yours? How's the mission going?"

Another grunt came through the phone, but this one sounded decidedly less pleased.

"There's been a bunch of fires in the city. More than natural, but the fire marshals couldn't find signs of accelerant."

"Oh?"

"Yeah… Most of the evidence was destroyed by the fires, but someone finally found a torn summoning circle at one of the scenes."

"Shit…" Rin cursed, his voice low, "Someone's using demons to start the fires?"

"Seems like it," Ryuuji said, his voice carrying a hard edge. "Hopefully whoever it was learned a hard lesson about summoning demons they can't control, but under the assumption that they're doing it on purpose we're trying to figure out what their next target could be in the hopes of heading them off; looking for connections between the different locations and trying to piece together a motive."

"Sounds boring."

"_You_ would think so," Ryuuji said with a laugh, "But… it's not bad. Just tense. We need to catch this fucker before someone gets hurt."

"Yeah, well if anyone can do that smart detective shit, it's you."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," Ryuuji said dryly, and Rin laughed. A comfortable silence passed between them, spent just listening to the sound of each other breathing as Rin made his way to the bedroom, closing the door securely behind him.

"I can think of something more fun to talk about though," Rin said as he undid his pants and kicked them off to lie in a pile on the floor. He then thought better of leaving them there and promptly put them in the laundry hamper. Ryuuji might not have been due back until after the mission was completed, but if Rin didn't do it now he'd forget to do it at all and catch an earful about it later.

"Yeah?" Ryuuji asked when Rin didn't continue, "What's that?"

"What are you wearing?"

"A-Are you serious?!" Ryuuji choked, sputtering in to the phone, "I'm in the hotel lobby!"

"Mmm, kinky." Rin laughed as he dug around in Ryuuji's dresser, pulling out one of his old oversized shirts and exchanging it for the shirt he'd been wearing.

"I'm serious, Rin. I'm sharing a room. I didn't even feel comfortable taking this call where they could listen in, so I came down here before I called."

"Does that mean you're still in uniform?"

"…Rin."

"You know I love a man in uniform," Rin purred, "Use that tie to drag you down like a dog on a leash."

"Rin!"

"Hey," Rin laughed, "You don't have to talk. Just listen."

The line was silent for a moment, heavy with the audible pause before Ryuuji gave his answer.

"…Fine."

Rin chuckled breathlessly. "Just in case you were wondering, I'm not wearing any pants."

Ryuuji snorted. After a short pause he added, "What else?"

The fact that his voice was audibly lower, audibly huskier, did not escape Rin as he crawled in to bed, still cradling the phone against his ear.

"I'm also wearing one of your old shirts."

"…Why?"

"Because it smells like you," Rin said softly, laughing as Ryuuji sputtered in indignation.

"It does not! I wash my clothes unlike _someone_."

"Maybe," Rin laughed, "But I can still smell it."

He lifted the collar of the shirt and held it to his nose, inhaling deeply and trying not to laugh as Ryuuji clicked his tongue in annoyance, muttering under his breath.

It was a little weird, but in hindsight Rin had never actually lived alone. Those first few nights where Ryuuji had gone away on a mission while he'd stayed home had left Rin feeling strangely more alone than he had in a long time. The smell of the other man, lingering on his old well-worn clothes was a simple comfort that helped Rin get through the night. He no longer needed it, but it had become a comfortable habit. Like a good luck charm.

Rin lay back against the bed, groaning lightly as he stretched out against the cool sheets, arching his back before falling slack. Time to get down to business. He licked his lips as he dipped his fingers under the waistband of his boxers, teasing them through the hair that trailed down between his legs.

"What would you do if you were here, I wonder?" Rin asked. It was rhetorical though. He knew Ryuuji wouldn't answer, not in any way that would be interesting while he was sitting in the public hotel lobby.

"Would you touch me?"

Ryuuji laughed, low and throaty, but still playful. "Of course."

"I bet you'd- ah, tease me, not q-quite giving me what I want," Rin said, his voice catching slightly as he finally touched himself, his fingers grazing along his length. Ryuuji was silent, but his breathing grew heavy.

"I bet you'd-"

"Rin, sorry. Stop," Ryuuji interrupted. What sounded like muffled conversation came over the line, then Ryuuji returned. "Something's happening. I've got to go," he said.

The line went dead with a click before Rin had a chance to respond, leaving him sitting there silently with his dick in hand, his arousal turning very quickly to frustration.

He groaned in irritation and abandoned the phone against the pillow, before quickly finishing himself off. No point in wasting a good erection. Even an angry wank was better than nothing.

It was quarter after three when the phone next rang and Rin jolted awake, fumbling for it in the dark, his mind still groggy with sleep. The number showed it was a work call. He glanced at the time, cursing under his breath before he answered the phone.

"I'm not on call when Ryuuji's working," he mumbled, his voice hard. He was about to hang up when he realized it was Shura on the line and something in her voice had him hesitating.

"Rin! We need ya'!" she said urgently, "The mission- Suguro is- Tha' whole city's on fire!"

The next half hour passed in a blur of motion, obscured under a mind numbing mix of lack of sleep, adrenaline, and cold hard dread as Rin roused Lily from bed and quickly gathered up everything both of them would need before dropping her off at her grandmother's.

Lily would be fine; the exorcist supply shop was covered in wards and in a location only exorcists could even get to. Ryuuji was the one who was in danger.

He'd failed to make it to his extraction point and hadn't been heard from in over an hour. Rin tried not to think about what that meant, to keep his racing thoughts under control as he made his way to the rendezvous point to receive his orders.


	25. Fire

I wanted to write this chapter because I still think Rin's powers have a lot of developing to do. Although I think shooting fire from his sword and having "named attacks" is cool, and an important step in learning to control his abilities, they definitely feel like training wheels for what it seems like he should eventually be able to do. This chapter explores that a little bit, at the same time once again having Rin grapple with his humanity and his otherness.

Thanks as always for reading. :')

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**Fire**

His blood boiled as fire raged through his veins. He didn't even feel the heat of the flames below, wasn't even conscious of the wash of heat that blew up from the street or the flaming cinders and dark billows of smoke that clogged the sky with hellfire as far as the eye could see.

He perched on the edge of the roof, his muscles tense, ready for action. He was fire. He was rage. He was going to kill the person who had hurt his-

"Rin!"

Shura's hand on his shoulder grounded him and some semblance of humanity returned to his eyes as he turned to look at her, even as blue flame still licked across his skin.

"I know ya' want ta' fight, but ya' can do more good from here," she said, "The fire's the real problem. We already got crews in position, so as soon as ya' give the word…"

He nodded shakily. Shura was right. Lily was safe, back at her grandmother's, and as much as he wanted to tear apart the person who'd started this, tear them limb from limb, he had to calm down, to concentrate. Killing always came easy. Everything else? Not so much. Destruction was fire's key nature, but not it's only one.

Ryuuji had given him that—the knowledge.

After a particularly violent bout of self-doubt—after being told for the nth time that he was dangerous, a menace, a threat on human life that needed to be extinguished, culled, as if he was less than livestock, nothing more than a tool, despite the fact that he had never—not even once!—burned a human by accident or on purpose—Ryuuji had taken him aside to comfort him.

Secured in Ryuuji's embrace, his face buried against his husband's chest to hide his frustrated, angry tears, Rin had listened more intently than he let on as Ryuuji explained how fire was an essential part of many ecosystems; how fire paved the way for new life in thick, growth choked forests by giving them the space and the food that was needed.

There was even a species of tree whose pinecones could only release seeds after a fire. Fire—something that normally destroyed indiscriminately, leaving nothing but death and destruction in its wake—was a required stage in the tree's lifecycle.

That thought was… comforting. Humbling.

He took a deep breath and closed his eyes, letting those thoughts comfort him even now as he reached out, feeling the heat within and letting his own flames spread. The exorcists around him gasped as blue fire licked across the rooftop, but Shura squeezed his shoulder, reminding him he wasn't alone even as he felt himself drifting away from his body, down towards the fire.

He could taste the stench of another demon on it, but that demon had started the fire and then abandoned it, letting it spread to devour the surrounding city without care. This fire was just that—normal fire—and it gave way to his touch without a fight, drawn to him as if he were fuel, becoming his and turning an intense unearthly blue.

He continued down the path of the flame, claiming it, feeling it, seeing what it saw and feeling what it felt—the crumbling buildings beneath him, turning to ash at his touch—the hunger, the desire to consume, to–

He drew himself back slightly, back to the hand on his shoulder, to the human presence beside him. He was okay. He could do this. He had to. Hundreds of people were relying on him, even if they didn't yet know it. Ryuuji was… He… Rin stopped. He couldn't afford to think about that now.

He reached out again, this time quickly, as quick as fire could spread, racing down the streets and through the buildings—empty, crumbling. He pulled the fire back to the street, snuffing it out so it couldn't spread, and shutting it down before moving on to the next building. He checked the next building and again found nothing—no survivors at least. He ignored the bodies where he found them, but pulled the fire back. There would be time for mourning later. For everyone.

He checked the next building, and the next.

There.

He pulled the fire back to the street, forcing it to abandon the building, and shook himself, forcing his consciousness back to his body.

"I found some," he said after he'd gathered his wits enough to speak, "Survivors. At… 1-Chome 5-3. I've cleared the way."

Shura squeezed his shoulder again and he didn't wait as the exorcists behind him scrambled to radio in the survivor's location to waiting rescue teams. He sped off again, no longer needing further instruction.

Everywhere he went he could feel it, almost taste it, the fear in the air. It was almost palpable. It left a sickly taste in his consciousness, but he needed it, using it to hunt out the survivors. And it went on and on like that, for what seemed like hours, the process of going back to his body getting harder and harder as he lost himself to the flames little by little until…

There…

Not fear; something familiar, warm, but not destructive like fire—something that felt comfortably like home.

Rin brushed up against a magic barrier, recognizing its touch instinctively even as it tried to repel him. Even as fire, Rin felt himself relax as some of the strain he'd been feeling vanished from his shoulders, even if fire didn't have shoulders.

It was Ryuuji; holed up in the corner of a building with a group of survivors, safe for the time being behind the force of his will and his shield. His brow was drenched with sweat and darkened with smudges of ash, and he was visibly shaking under the strain of maintaining the barrier, but even as fire Rin could see it when Ryuuji smiled—that self-confident cocky smirk he wore when he realized that the tides had turned and his gamble had paid off. Rin wanted to cry out to him, but fire was incapable of tears, incapable of hugs and smothering kisses that spoke of fear and relief and joy all at once. Those would come later, after the mission when the demons were exorcised and the fires put out. For now Ryuuji was safe. In the meantime, other people needed him too. He had work to do. He could do this.

* * *

This chapter of Domesticia is brought to you by VineTabris, Jaiden, Senem, and Angerawr. Thank you so much for your support. (´∀｀人)

If you like my work please consider supporting me on a Patre0n for early access to new chapters and all kinds of bonus content.


	26. The First Worst Day

Here we go. Now that Lily's a little older and starting to question things, it going to get little bit angsty. :')

This chapter is brought to you by Angerawr, Senem, VineTabris, and Jaiden. Thanks for supporting me on Patre0n. (∗∕ ∕•̥̥̥̥∕ω∕•̥̥̥̥∕)

Thanks for reading.

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**The First Worst Day**

Shiemi was wearing a calm quiet smile, enjoying the sun as she waited patiently outside the school. The bell rang and students started pouring out of the building, fleeing the tedium of school in favor of freedom, but she knew something was wrong the moment she picked Lily out of the crowd.

She had only picked her up from school a handful of times so far, but Lily had been bright and cheerful every time, eager to tell Aunty Shiemi about her day at school. Today however, Lily walked with her head down and her shoulder slumped, clutching at the straps of her backpack like she was carrying the weight of the world inside of it.

"Lily-chan?"

The girl flinched, looking up at Shiemi like she hadn't even noticed who had come to pick her up, but after the initial surprise passed Lily sighed, her shoulders relaxing ever so slightly as she threw her arms around Shiemi in a tight hug, pressing her face against her side.

"Lily, Sweety, what's the matter?" Shiemi knelt down so she could talk to Lily, face-to-face, as soon as the little girl released her from the hug.

Lily frowned, her lips pursed tightly as she looked down at her feet.

"I'm not a liar," she said softly, her voice quavering.

Shiemi blinked.

"O-Of course you're not, Sweetheart," Shiemi said as she took Lily's hand, "Did someone say you were?"

Lily just shook her head, clinging to Shiemi's hand silently. Shiemi didn't want to pressure her if she didn't want to talk, so they simply started walking home—home in this case being Shiemi's house.

"Are my dads at work?" Lily asked, and Shiemi nodded.

"They'll be home in an hour or two."

Lily thought about this for a moment, her lips pursed.

"Is Uncle Yukio at your house?"

"No, he's at work too."

"Good."

"Lily! That's not very nice."

"But he doesn't like me," Lily protested.

"That's not true. He just… That's just how he is with everyone," Shiemi said softly. She couldn't argue. She'd seen the distance Yukio tried to put between himself and Lily. He'd gotten better about distancing himself from people over the years, but it had resurfaced the moment he heard Shiemi was going to carry Rin and Ryuuji's child. She'd chalked it up to awkward jealousy, but Yukio's relationship with both Rin and Lily remained strained. She thought things would get better when he asked her out, but… If even a child could notice, it was probably about time she had a talk with him about it. Lily and Rin were both important parts of her life. They were a package deal he'd have to get used to, and it wasn't something he should have held against any of them.

"So, did you do anything fun today?" she asked as they walked, trying both to change the subject as well as engage Lily mentally and attempt to cheer her up.

"I played tagged during recess."

Shiemi giggled. "That does sound fun, but what about during class?"

Lily thought about it for a moment and then said, "Sachiko Sensei read us a book about animals and their babies."

"Oh! That sounds very cute. What kind of animals were in the book?"

"All kinds!" Lily said, spreading her arms out dramatically. "Giraffes, and wolfs, and pandas, and oh- oran- Oranitans!"

"Orangutans?" Shiemi correctly softly.

"Yeah!" Lily shouted, "Oran- Oranitans!"

"And which animals was your favorite?" Shiemi asked.

"Possums," Lily said without skipping a beat, and Shiemi sputtered, covering her mouth before she could laugh.

"Why possums?"

"Because they're cute, and they carry their babies around with them, and they have long tails they can grab stuff with like… like..." she trailed off, her previous enthusiasm draining out of her. A single sniffle was Shiemi's only warning as Lily started to quietly sob, her tiny shoulders shaking.

"L-Lily, Sweetheart, what's the matter?" Shiemi asked, stopping to kneel in front of Lily and take her in to her arms. The little girl continued to cry, showing no signs of stopping, so Shiemi scooped her up, gently patting her back and letting her cry against her shoulder as she carried her the rest of the way home.

By the time they arrived at Shiemi's family shop Lily had pretty much cried herself out. She hiccupped occasionally, sniffing back fresh tears, but it didn't seem like Shiemi had to expect a repeat performance. Not for a while at least.

She set Lily down and dried her tears, wiping her face clean of salt and snotty noses before sending her in to the garden to play while Shiemi prepared her after school snack. She couldn't suppress a smile as Lily grimaced—she was not fond of Shiemi's cooking—because it meant for the time being at least, Lily was back to normal. Perhaps she was simply distracted, but that gave Shiemi time to get to the bottom of things.

There was a really easy way to accomplish that too, if Shiemi was lucky. Lily and her classmates all had a journal they wrote in daily on various topics, writing simple little stories or drawing pictures about their day to day lives in which their teacher would often leave notes marking the progress or problems they faced, in and outside of the classroom. Shiemi retrieved Lily's backpack and took it to the kitchen table before removing Lily's journal, and there, on the latest page was a crayon drawing of Lily with Rin and Ryuuji.

Beneath the drawing, in shaky crayon lettering, it read:

_My dad is really big.  
My daddy has a tail._

Attached to the page was a sticky note with neat handwriting which read "Lily might need some help distinguishing reality from fiction."

Shiemi glanced out her kitchen window to where Lily knelt, digging happily in the dirt of a flowerbed with a child's plastic pail and shovel. A large greenman spirit stood nearby protectively, watching her play like a silent guardian. Shiemi's garden was crawling with them—her little helpers, on and off the battlefield—but Lily was oblivious to their presence. Rin and Ryuuji had very carefully seen to the fact that Lily had never received a mashou.

Shiemi bit her lip as she watched the little girl play. Lily's comment about not being a liar suddenly made sense. She might not have been able to see the greenmen or other spirits or demons, but she could still see Rin's tail and strange things happened around her with what was probably an alarming frequency.

Quietly, Shiemi went to the fridge and began to prepare Lily's snack. She might have been Lily's birth mother, but Rin and Ryuuji were her _parents_. That was a conversation for them to have with her. In the meantime she could make sure Lily was happy and healthy, and then pass along what she'd learned.

It was going to be a hard enough conversation no matter what Lily's mood was.


	27. Reflections

Hey, everyone! ヾ(≧∪≦*)ノ〃

This is just a little warning I might not update this story for a bit. I'm gonna be doing a 30 day kink writing challenge on my blog next month, so that'll probably take up a lot of my time, but thanks for being patient!

As always, all comments/reviews are greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading! :'D

If you like my writing, please consider supporting me on Patre0n. ∠( ᐛ 」∠)＿ This chapter is brought to you by VineTabris, Senem, Jaiden, and Angewrar.

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**Reflections**

Shiemi had already briefed Rin when he walked by the bathroom door and had to do a double take, shaking his head to make sure he wasn't imagining things.

Lily was standing on a step stool in front of the vanity, leaning over the sink and staring at herself in the mirror, twisting her head every which way and making all sorts of intense faces, as if searching for something that wasn't there.

"What'chya doin'?" Rin asked softly as he leaned against the doorframe, not wanting to embarrass or startle her.

She heaved a long suffering sigh and looked up at him with a concerned expression. "You know how people say babies got their parents' eyes and noses? I've got Dad's hair, but…" she trailed off, staring in to the mirror once more and missing Rin's amused snort.

Lily had dirty blonde hair, something she'd obviously gotten from her mother, and she had no idea that even in his thirties, Ryuuji took meticulous care of his hair, booking salon appointments at the first sign of his roots peeking out under the bleach. Rin honestly didn't know how he hadn't gone bald like his old man.

"Do you think I've got your nose?" Lily asked.

Rin fell back on humor, the same way he always did when he felt that people around him needed cheering up or distracting. He feigned confusion and touched his face. "No," he said, "I've still got it."

Lily pursed her lips and glared at him through the mirror's reflection. Dang. That would have worked when she was younger, sending her in to a fit of laughter and distracting her from the topic. No such luck now.

"I hear you didn't have a great day at school," Rin said, placing his hand on her head.

"Daddy, when is my tail gonna' grow in?"

He snorted back laughter and Lily glared at him.

"Sorry, Stringbean, but I don't think you're gonna get a tail," he said as he ruffled her hair. She swatted his hands away and he was expecting another glare, but his eyes widened as Lily looked up at him in the mirror and furrowed her brow, her eyes wet with the tears she was valiantly holding back. He was about to ask her what was wrong when she spoke first.

"We talked about families at school today," she said wiping away tears, hanging her head and staring down in to the sink instead of meeting the eyes of his reflection

"Oh yeah? I saw your drawing," Rin said, trying to sound casual as he bent down to wrap his arms around her, resting his chin on her head and holding her close, "Looked pretty good."

"Kiko-chan said I can't have two dads."

Rin froze, and Lily turned in his arms to look up at him, the look on her face heartbreaking.

"Sachiko Sensei said she was right."

"Oh," Rin said, suddenly really wishing Ryuuji was there. "Well, I'm sure she didn't mean it like that. I mean… I guess technically they're correct," Rin said with a shrug, "You know where babies come from. Biologically you can't have two dads, but I've told you about Grandpa Shiro before, right?" He waited for Lily to nod and then continued, his voice wistful. "He wasn't biologically my dad either, but he was still my dad in all the ways that matter the most. He read to me and taught me how to tie a tie, and how to be a good person. He encouraged me to pursue my hobbies and didn't give up on me, even when I'd given up on myself. It didn't matter that he wasn't my real dad. He was still my dad, you know what I mean?"

Lily nodded and looked up at him. "So… I am adopted…?"

Rin face palmed, scrubbing his hand up through his hair. "No, you're not adopted, but… It's a little complicated. We should probably wait until Dad gets home before we talk about that, okay?"

"Okay." She nodded, lips pursed as she went back to studying their reflections.

"You're our daughter and we both love you very much," Rin said and he planted a kiss on the top of her head and gave her a quick squeeze of a hug. "And family is a lot more than just moms and dads, you know. They come in all shapes and sizes."

Lily stopped crying, sniffing back her tears, but she hung her head dejectedly, staring down in to the sink. Rin pursed his lips as he studied her face in the mirror, trying to think of something more to say when Lily's tiny shoulders heaved with a dramatic sigh.

"But I'm not getting a tail."

Rin barked out a laugh and Lily glared at him in the mirror again, letting out an annoyed grunt as he ruffled her hair affectionately.

"Sorry, Pumpkin. No tails."

She puffed out her cheeks in an exaggerated pout and leaned over the sink towards the mirror, kicking her legs as she supported her weight on the vanity.

"What do I have then?" she asked.

"From me, you mean?"

Lily hummed in affirmation and Rin frowned, trying to think of what he could say that wouldn't count as perpetuating a lie. He'd always assumed they'd tell her when the time felt right, but he'd also assumed Ryuuji would be there for it too.

He placed his hand on Lily's head, running his fingers over her fine blonde hair.

"You know, your dad actually bleaches his hair, right? You can't have two colored hair naturally."

Lily nodded, and then turned to look up at Rin, her brow furrowed as she realized what he was saying.

"I don't have Dad's hair?" she asked. Rin shook his head.

"You have your mom's hair."

Lily looked up at him in surprise, her eyes wide.

"I have a mom?"

Her voice was caught somewhere between wistful and disbelieving, as if it was too much to hope for. A small smile spread over her face as she looked up at him, and Rin's heart broke. He smiled down at her.

"Yup. And you have your dad's beautiful brown eyes."

Her eyes sparkled and she smiled brightly, waiting eagerly for more, for the next part. Rin wanted to look away, afraid to disappoint her, but he didn't. He just kept on smiling and comprehension sparked momentarily in her eyes before her expression fell, her brow creasing. Rin took her in to his arms and held her close, tucking her head under his chin so she wouldn't see him starting to cry.


End file.
